The fact that someone can get hurt seems like an illogical behavior, typical of madness, however, it is a negative impulse that we all have to a greater or lesser extent, and that manifests itself in the characteristics of self-destructive people.
Sigmund Freud discovered that we all have an impulse of life and everything constructive, what he called “life boost. “However, we also have the opposite impulse that leans toward death and destruction, which he called the “impulse of death. “
“When you are trapped in destruction, you must open a door to creation. “Anas Nin?
That would be one of the reasons why wars happened at any time and in all cultures, and that’s also why many people develop self-destructive symptoms and behaviors, however, only in some cases do these behaviors take root and become permanent personality traits.
This usually happens when there is a strong component of repressed anger, actually these aggressive impulses are directed at each other, but for some reason it is impossible to express them, often because they are talking to a loved one or because they are afraid. the consequences of giving them a voice.
In such cases, the assault ends up turning against himself, in this way the person learns to behave like his worst enemy and self-destructive personalities are set up.
This list of ten characters of self-destructive people is an attempt to shed light on this topic.
Self-destructive beliefs include all thoughts intended to underestimate a person, impede progress, or devalue their achievements. In a self-destructive person’s mind, these thoughts arise almost automatically.
Is your mind the setting for “self-fulfilling prophecies”: you can’t, you can’t, you won’t be able to. His faith is so great that it actually ends up being like this. There is also an approach in which the individual always focuses on what was missing, what was not perfect, what was not or was not, all this is a powerful nutrient for self-destruction.
In this case, passivity has to do with the inability to respond to a situation or circumstance that causes harm, the person realizes that this is a negative thing, but does not take steps to stop or control its effect, for example, this happens when we do. not defend us against abuse or aggression.
Forced incompetence is the tendency to highlight gaps or lack of skills, before attempting to list all the personal limitations that hinder it, they make no effort to overcome them and become a justification for not acting.
The way we eat says a lot about how we think and feel about ourselves. Not eating is one of the ways many people get hurt. They don’t feed your body the nutrients it needs to stay healthy.
The same thing happens at the opposite end. Overeating leads to a variety of health problems, both in the short and long term. Sometimes an insatiable appetite appears. Even when you eat a lot, there is no satisfaction, but sadness, guilt and feelings. . . they want to eat more.
Self-destructive people often develop hostile or harmful attitudes towards others, create unnecessary conflicts, or are rude, rude, envious, conversational, etc. , see the other, basically, as a source of confrontation. Others are the cause of your frustration, because your links are based on comparisons that, for some reason, you always end up losing.
Usually, after these conflicts, they fall into deep episodes of self-pity, they attack, but when others retaliate, they behave as victims of an unjust act, they insult, but when they are insulted, they repent, they do not admit that they are reaping what they sowed.
Some self-harms are obvious and some are less. Some people are deliberately injured: they are cut or pulled from their hair; they are also exposed to risky situations, causing frequent accidents; Other times, this is done in a less obvious way: like a painful tattoo or piercing on a very sensitive part of the hair. Body.
There are also acts of self-harm when substances are abused that damage the body, the most obvious case is drug abuse, such as alcohol, addictions are highly self-destructive and, in their extreme degree, always lead to death.
Social suicide occurs when emotional ties are broken. It is usually a gradual process: first there is a reluctance to be with others and, little by little, this results in progressive isolation.
Self-destructive people not only isolate themselves, but also develop a series of behaviors that irritate others, are sometimes too demanding or despise others, they only see the negative side of people, they believe that the rejection of others is justified
For the self-destructive person it is very difficult to be honest with himself, he cannot recognize his feelings and emotions, but unconsciously tries to hide them, does all kinds of rationalizations to justify his behavior and refuses to admit that he has a problem.
That’s why it’s so hard to help you. If someone suggests consulting a psychologist, think it’s a sign of aggression and contempt. You may react aggressively if you receive advice or suggest that changing certain behaviors can improve your life. What do these people want is not to be okay? And, if possible, that the culprits are the circumstances or the other people.
Self-destructive people often forget their own bodies. They do not perform any physical activity and have a very negative opinion about their own body and of course about the physical pleasure it entails, such as sexuality. Lack of physical care is a manifestation of the little self-appreciation they feel for themselves.
Don’t try to solve the problems you’re worried about. If you suffer from insomnia, you passively accept it; if they experience emotional discomfort, they choose to victimize themselves rather than find a way to solve it.
Life requires sacrifices in many circumstances. However, they are worth it when they are geared towards greater success, when they are a necessary step towards achieving well-being, if they simply become a constant suffering that generates a situation that does not progress, they correspond to self-destructive behaviors.
Some believe that these continuous sacrifices are proof of nobility, good morality or altruism, but what lies behind it is an act of self-buttoning, this type of behavior hides the renunciation of desires, dreams and achievements, a painful or frustrating situation remains. just to reduce the chances of being well.
Basically, self-destructive people do not feel worthy to be loved, in fact their self-esteem is very low, so, one way or another, they do not tolerate a relationship where everything goes well, curiously if they feel loved or appreciated, they will do everything in their power to stop it. They feel better about the role of the victims than with the role of the lucky ones; prefers to have a reason to complain.
In addition, they are likely to become capricious or demanding. They try by all means to convince the other person that it is not worth maintaining a bond with them, or that the affection they receive is unfounded. Addressing positive relationships is one way to stay in a self-destructive position.
This type of behavior presents poorly resolved experiences and difficulties in structuring the image of themselves, self-destructive people are above all victims of themselves. They are trapped in the domain imposed by a person or a circumstance against which they cannot defend themselves, it is as if a person is trapped inside a mirror that reflects them in a distorted way.
In fact, the characteristics of self-destructive people indicate difficulties in their self-esteem, but in addition, there is a difficulty in self-perception: seeing oneself in a more constructive way involves questioning a specific figure or mandate of authority. behind this position lies the unconscious fear of being happier than the father or mother; or to prove that a religious truth is not so true. In any case, it requires professional treatment.