Many parents find it difficult to raise their children and let them gradually return to their lives. The goal of a good education is not to exaggerate parental control, but to convey the best values and customs as children grow up and prepare for independence. But we must not forget the main objective and also that the process must be carried out little by little.
However, some parents, faced with the fear of the dangers offered by the world, abuse parental control to protect their children and quickly remove them from any potentially dangerous, real or imaginary source. On the other hand, this kind of fear and the way we treat them are often related to the very education that parents receive.
- There is no doubt that controlling children is very tempting.
- In the end.
- Is it easier to survive day by day?That’s why it’s said that “prevention is better than cure.
- “But no one said education would be easy or comfortable.
- In fact.
- It’s getting harder and harder.
- We as parents have to compete with a multitude of external agents out of our control.
- However.
- Developing an obsession with parental control is not ideal.
- As we will see below.
While a little control is good, being an obsessive controller is not only bad for children, but it’s also destructive to parents, who carry a heavy burden, great responsibility, and worse, a big blame for their children.
To educate is to guide, not to mark a single option on the way, to educate is to accompany and lend a hand, not to take away from others what suits them.
Rebellion is almost natural, it is part of the autonomy process itself, but there are ways to rebel, it is not the same to rebel against the world as against parents, it is not the same to rebel against the system imposed by the state against the rules imposed at home.
Children need a certain level of freedom. If you try to control all aspects of their lives, they will claim autonomy more strongly, and probably with less success. If a parent insists on controlling what their child can play, what clothes to wear, which book to read, or things. so, can you rebel your child, and sooner or later it will happen.
Of course, as a parent, you should monitor certain things and guide your child, making sure he makes a coherent and appropriate decision. Let your child make his own decisions and, if he doesn’t agree, ask him to justify them. If you think your personal decision is more correct, guide your child, help him choose better, consider the consequences of his decisions, and let him suffer the consequences (as long as it doesn’t really harm his health and safety).
If you constantly control what your child does and become his or her shadow, he or she will probably be less creative. Not being able to make decisions based on people important to him, such as his parents, will put him at risk when he really needs to start making decisions in his life. He’ll start letting time decide for him, in case no one wants to accept his decisions.
If you don’t think it’s important, it may be because you’re one of those who think creativity is useless, or it’s just to make beautiful drawings, write amazing texts or decorate the house with more or less grace. But being creative is, much more than that.
Creativity is the ability to look for different solutions to the problems encountered, it is the ability to rethought these problems, to see things differently. Being creative not only allows you to do great things, but can it make you amazing?her problems and adversity and achieve what she wants to be. Are you going to deny that to your son?
Don’t tell him how to do things the best way, give them the opportunity to find a solution, see things differently by solving a problem, planning, expanding and if the problem is solved, no matter what he did. The most important thing is that he did it alone and found a solution. Understand, of course, that from time to time you may be right and even have a more advantageous point of view than yours.
Over-control works for your child’s mind like a cage of limited dimensions, through which he can barely move, imagine yourself locked in there, not knowing why, in a room of 5 square meters, you can’t leave.
How long would it take you to start being anxious?It’s this anxiety your child experiences when you control every minute of your life, when you organize each of his or her moments and leave no room for them to be themselves.
Don’t think because you have the idea that you can control it, you’re in control. When the door opens, because your child is already too big to be held behind her, when he releases that door himself, you’ll see that in fact, he had no control over anything; that anyone who walks through that door is a nervous person, wanting to do exactly the opposite of what you say, but without the ability to decide things consistently.