Most of us have had to overcome complicated situations at some point in our lives, those that force us to stop and get stuck, it’s hard to deal with life’s crises, those we call negative because they force us to change, whether in the way we act or think, but they can also become opportunities for us to move forward.
While there are many types of life crises, some are more common than others, such as those related to the evolution of stages, such as the transition from childhood to adolescence, from youth to adulthood, the crisis of maturity, and the end. life.
- Other crises are identity-related; have to do with who we are and what we identify with.
- And there are also crises caused by a loss.
- Such as the death of a loved one.
- A divorce or a dismissal.
Crises are opportunities for transformation, moments of transition before which we must act, here are 4 ways to deal with these situations to strengthen ourselves.
“Man finds himself when faced with an obstacle” – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry-
Vital crises can begin with some warning signs, such as feelings of sadness and fear, or symptoms of anxiety and even pain, if we say they don’t exist, these signs can increase, with more severe symptoms and more serious consequences.
On the other hand, we must keep in mind that our personal history influences our understanding of the crisis and how we deal with it, for example, if it is a loss, feelings of abandonment can occur from what we have experienced during childhood.
In addition, the way we usually solve our problems is also crucial, if we usually drown in a glass of water, we will probably be overwhelmed by the crisis and have more difficulty coping with it, so it is important to think about what. is happening to find new alternatives, make the right decisions and make the necessary changes.
This situation can also involve the reformulation of values and beliefs, and the creation of new objectives, vital crises force us to think, to learn new ways of dealing with situations, so we cannot be paralyzed, but to act to move forward. .
“Only a crisis, real or perceived, leads to real change. When this crisis occurs, how does act depend on the ideas that float in the environment?. – Milton Friedman-
Crises, like every process, have a beginning, a development with a high moment and an end, so it is appropriate to train our reflection to remember that what happens to us will also happen.
Now what to do with this temporary pain? Crises often provide opportunities for change, so we can use them to learn from other points of view and other ways of doing things. In fact, it’s a great time to stop repeating behaviors and ways of doing things that no longer work.
However, the temporality of life’s crises is a double-edged sword, on the one hand it will help us reduce pain and transform it; however, the opportunities that accompany crises can also disappear after a while, our attitude will be fundamental. It will depend on us whether we will get stronger out of this situation or not.
“In great crises, the heart breaks or heals. “- Honore de Balzac-
The solutions of the past no longer work. The previous situation, although we thought it was better, no longer exists, accepting this will allow us to better manage our emotions, although the past is more comfortable and gives us a sense of security, the sooner we recognize what we are facing, the sooner we can find new strategies to overcome it.
Sometimes clinging to the past creates false security in the face of uncertainty; However, in a crisis we have to deal with our insecurities and weaknesses, so instead of using the past as an excuse, we can use it as a reference. It will be easier to find strength and resources that we had forgotten.
Moreover, without clinging to the past, we will be able to look more clearly to the future, reflect and visualize where we want to go; now, if we remain obsessed with the past, it can hinder us and make us think that our goal has evaporated or that we will not be able to achieve it.
So if we abandon the past, we’re more likely to realize that the crisis is just one point. When we look to the future, new opportunities may arise.
“The problem with the world is that smart people are full of doubts, while stupid people are full of certainties. “- Charles Bukowski-
The crises of life often overwhelm us with shame and guilt, feelings that can take us away from our loved ones, yet there is nothing wrong with recognizing that we cannot leave a situation alone. Finding the support of people close to us or in the same situation can give us strength. Of course, it’s important that the people who support us are optimistic and help us think or calm anxiety.
In this sense, we can also consult a psychologist to gain a neutral and prejudice-free perspective, a mental health professional can provide us with a safe space to talk without fear about our situation and how we feel. Also help us think about what happened and find a solution.
The important thing is to be aware that there is no need to go through this situation alone, there are inevitable crises that are part of life, we have all passed them. Other crises, especially those in a relationship, are also lived by many people, who can even share our emotions, so talking to others about what is happening to us can help us feel understood.
Life crises don’t have to be an extremely difficult process, but we can’t ignore them thinking they’re going to go away on their own, they’re not easy to overcome, and they take time, but they can be opportunities for us to rediscover ourselves. .
“I have six honest servants (I’ve been taught everything I know). Their names are: who, why, when, how, where and who?. – Rudyard Kipling-