Attachment is the emotional bond that first develops and leads to the pursuit of safety and well-being. In some cases, when the mother or primary caregiver represents a source of danger and protection for the child, this is known as disorganized attachment.
For Bowlby (1969), saying that a child has attachment to someone means that he is willing to seek closeness and contact in a particular figure, this happens in certain situations, especially when he is afraid, tired or uneasy. the truth is that everyone needs attachment links that change or adapt to the new rules.
- “It is the child’s previous story that determines how he feels in the world and what is expected of him.
- White Charo?.
Type D attachment (disorganized) was originally related to pathological environments and different forms of child abuse, both physical and emotional within the family system, in this sense, victims of violence and abuse may have difficulty connecting with others simply because of lack of knowledge. or a role model.
The likelihood that the anger that accompanies these children will eventually incorporate their personality in one way or another is very high, this negative emotional burden makes it difficult to control their own behavior and regulat their own emotions, increasing the risk that they too will resort to them. Violence.
Punishment and disproportionate abuse are destructive messages for victims, which internalize at very deep levels because they come from reference people, so they have a significant impact on critical areas of child development, preventing their social, emotional and cognitive future. development while ruining childhood.
Here are the five most important consequences of a disorganized attachment to you, reader:
A child with a disorganized attachment can make a bad image of himself, you may even believe it’s the cause of your parents’ lack of control, leading you to present yourself as a bad, inappropriate, or dangerous person. , the world will appear to you as an insecure and chaotic place, where there are rules and rules beyond your comprehension.
Abused children often have feelings of inferiority, which manifest themselves in shyness and fear; in turn, hyperactivity behaviors may occur, trying to attract the attention of those around them in a desperate attempt to get reinforcements they can’t find on natural roads.
Types of unsafe attachment, especially disorganized people, are associated with higher rates of antisocial behavior and behavioral problems. It’s not uncommon for them to reproduce the pattern of relationship they see at home with their parents and caregivers. They feel confused and worried about their children, closeness to their parents because they don’t know how and when they will attend to their needs, and they distrust physical contact, especially with adults.
The main reason these children’s behavior is disorganized is because they can’t find a solution to their problems without leaving or approaching their main guardians. In fact, is it called disorganized attachment? Because they are unable to establish a general pattern of their emotional responses: both expressed and internal.
Sadness, indifference and irritation are the most common emotions on the face of these little ones, to this emotional combination must be added the lack of motivation, which can lead them to a depressive mood or self-destructive behaviors in the most serious cases. Other symptoms, such as fear, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress, are the natural consequence of living in a context they cannot control.
On the other hand, these minors seem less able to cope with the stress associated with separating their main caregivers. The reason for this: is disability linked to the lack of coherent strategies that allow them to regulate negative emotions.
Thanks to several studies, children with ADHD are known to have a significant self-regulation deficit (impulse control, calming ability, affective regulation, perseverance, inhibition, etc. ). The truth, and without leaving the Subject We Are Concerned About is that the early relationship between the child and his or her primary guardians determines the acquisition of these skills. As a result, children with type D attachments are more vulnerable to problems in acquiring these skills.
When we talk about loss of family or mistreatment with these types of people, there are large gaps in their reasoning or speech. Experiences that are very traumatic have the potential to generate disconnection at the brain level; I mean, it’s like the brain hemispheres are separating.
Sometimes these children do not interact with their peers or caregivers, because they do not have the necessary skills and reinforcements, they do not know how to respond to others in certain situations, in fact they have been observed to perform unfinished performance or disoriented movements without direction or clear intent. They show immobilization, hit each other with their hands or head and feel like escaping the situation, even if they are in the presence of their caregivers.
Its behavior can range from a very wide range, from passivity to nervousness. Since they are not able to predict caregiver behavior, it makes sense that they try to capture all available indicators, adopting a hypervigilance position.
“It’s not just the blows that hurt. Pamela Palenciano?
Stories in which the protagonists are ina attention, abuse or sexual abuse are what shape a disorganized style of attachment. This bank of childhood experiences results in unsafe, shy and withdrawn adults in relationships with others. they have learned a way to build and maintain relationships that only cause them more pain; a style that, at the same time, cannot change.
Thus, when they do not find in their childhood the opportunity to acquire a symbolic representation of their mental states in the minds of others, their pattern of attachment becomes chaotic. Even if they are able to mentalize, they are likely to have a flaw in integrating their organization “I” and their mental representations.
It is a mistake to think that when children are young they do not understand what is going on around them, or that they will not remember certain times when they will grow up, the truth is that everything that happens in your creation will have the potential to affect their near future tomorrow. In this sense, we have a duty to be loving, understanding, providing them with security, protection and support if we want them to develop a secure attachment. Children are the future, let’s take care of them.