“Because my mom wouldn’t let me eat chocolate, I buy my daughter a bar a day,” “My dad would punish me if I hadn’t studied, I’ll let my son do whatever he wants at school. “these familiar phrases for you?
There is a wide variety of textbooks that tell you how to be the perfect or ideal parent; however, practice makes the teacher and, in real life, it is not easy to make these tips so good.
- In fact.
- Did he certainly suffer? When I was young.
- You also probably swore not to do the same with your children.
- Maybe you kept that promise.
- But that doesn’t mean it’s good for them.
Did you know that more than half of the self-help books available in bookstores are meant to be a good father?Apparently, the fear of making mistakes or repeating the mistakes of the past is very strong and determines what adults read today.
But look, we don’t get confused, making mistakes is not the same as failing. No one is born knowing, as the popular saying goes. One of the most common mistakes of parents is to prevent their children, which they themselves suffered as children. . That’s because sometimes we thought it was a bad thing when in fact ‘our parents were doing these things for our own good. ‘
For example, if our mom didn’t want us to eat chocolates every day, it wasn’t because it was bad, but because she knew the habit would cause cavities, obesity and death. other matters. If our father asked us if we were doing well in school, it was because he couldn’t let us live voluntarily from our studies.
According to the researchers, we inherit trauma and habits from our parents, and it is very likely that we will end up doing the same with our children, in addition to the typical expressions they used to tell you when you were little and sure you will. re-ask your children; it can also happen because of a child problem, and your children end up suffering the consequences.
We’re talking about these things your parents said, that you probably hated, and now you’re rehearsing with your kids:
You feel guilty about leaving them every day to go to work, so buy whatever they ask of you, respond to your whims, no matter what. Because you’re not by your side watching them grow, do you feel compelled to win them?Kind of with presents.
Before, when we got home on a low note, we were punished, nowadays, if this happens, parents rush to talk to the teacher and ask for an explanation of why they failed their child. Don’t try to get out of the situation to think that the teacher is involved with your child or that your child is not responsible for not studying.
It is a modern evil that we may not have suffered so much when we were little, because a few years ago there was not so much offer of programs, video games, social networks, websites, etc.
You may have been angry more than once because your parents sent you to your room to study without watching TV. Now you think your kids can spend hours in front of the screen, which also makes it easier to take care of them.
It is never too much to express our affection for those around us, when they are babies it is easier to tell them that they are the most important thing in the world, that we love them, etc. , but over time, that habit will disappear.
When children reach adolescence, for example, they are the ones who ask parents not to be so effusive because they are embarrassed. Instead of suppressing your affection, continue with expressions of affection.
It can be said that punishing our children is the fastest way for the child not to repeat what he has done wrong, but how long do they learn the lesson?
If you already know that the next day you will forget what happened and let them do whatever they want, their words are not worth much, no matter how much your parents were very strict with you, but remember that there was no greater lesson than rebuking seriously and intensely at that time.