Each person tries to find happiness in his own way, however, in this research we often stray and forget what really makes us feel good, in this way we do things that we believe we should do, but that deliberately deprive us of that happiness, even if we are not always aware of it.
Many of the things we do thinking are what we have to do to be happy are nothing more than thieves of happiness, to which we open the door and let them devour us inside, those thieves arrive in the form of social conventions to which we submit, in a demonstration of freedom, to achieve a happiness that , in fact, it’s somewhere else.
- As social beings we are.
- Human beings want to connect with others and please to be able to feel part of a group.
- However.
- In addition to the need to be part of a community.
- People often choose to do what is necessary to adapt without asking questions or resisting.
Many people believe that they should submit because otherwise they will not be accepted, this insecurity leads them to give up their own desires and ideas to do what the flock asks of them, believing that integration is happiness, that the flock seeks happiness for all. In this way, the person submits his values and thoughts to a kind of adaptation in an attempt to integrate them into a mold.
Listening to other people’s advice is fine, but something very different is to blindly believe and follow what they tell you without questioning anything, whatever your own values. If, as a child, we learn to blindly believe in the figures that represent authority, we will in time be obedient and sumissive adults who, in fear of making decisions, prefer others to think and assume their own responsibilities.
So, instead of following their hearts and creating their own path, many people prefer to obey orders and follow a path designed by others; a path that supposedly seeks the common good and the best for most, but there is no place on this path to develop critical thinking or to find what really makes sense as an individual.
If you do the things others want you to do and live to meet your expectations, you will act for the happiness of others, not yours. At this point, it’s not worth saying ‘I can’t choose’. a free being and you can always choose, another very different is to choose the simplest or least painful option, at least in the short term.
Even if others try to figure out what’s best for you, they do it in the background thinking about your personal needs, your own satisfaction. When the expectations of others do not give you the freedom to choose or try to manipulate your decisions at any time. In this way, they resist not letting you deviate from what they expect.
We were educated in the culture of distraction, we are constantly busy doing things that do not contribute to our well-being and that require our attention constantly, this constant distraction fills us with confusion and mental agitation.
In these circumstances, it is very difficult to find a real goal and, much worse, to be aware of what needs to be done to achieve it. These distractions deprive us of the peace and quiet we need.
We need to put aside these unnecessary distractions and focus our attention on what really matters, which fills our hearts with joy and helps us to become the best version of ourselves.
Another way to act that steals happiness is to strive to create a perfect life. Perfection is impossible. Life is a continuous path of growth and improvement. Trying to make everything perfect prevents us from consciously appreciating who we are and what we have, as we focus on eliminating failures.
The constant pursuit of perfection inevitably means stress, control over others, as well as feelings of disappointment, shame and even self-contempt.