Knowing to love is a true art that requires self-knowledge, experience and goodwill, because sometimes, even if there is love, its quality is not always the same, there are loves and loves.
Some manage to transform our lives in a positive way forever; others, however, are a temporary or lasting storm. Some are kept alone by habit and essentially do not add up to or subtract anything from our lives.
- An evolved and mature love is healthy.
- In the broadest sense of the word.
- Greatly enriches the lives of those involved and contributes to the development and expansion of all.
“There is only one remedy for love: to love more. “Henry David Thoreau-
Knowing to love means recognizing the boundaries of a relationship and achieving a certain individual balance also means learning to give up impossible desires and romantic fantasies.
Next, we’ll dive into the topic by presenting seven tips to keep in mind for knowing how to love.
The first lesson to know how to love is to understand that each person is a unique universe. In love, especially in romantic relationships, there is sometimes an uncontrollable will to build an extremely strong mutual identity.
However, although two people share the same experience, each sees and assimilates the experience differently, this diversity makes visible the differentiation of the members, allowing each one to be what it really is, by remaining separate individuals. and normal.
People have a basic personality structure, which usually lasts from childhood to old age, yet they are also ever-changing beings, time, experiences and learning bring about change.
To know how to love is to understand that. In other words, it means accepting that it may be necessary to relearn to love the same person; parents, for example, experience it when their children are children, then teenagers and adults; in relationships being idealized becomes a real person and you have to fall in love.
The first love to be strengthened is self-love. To know how to love others, you must first be in relative peace and balance with yourself. We need to be aware of who we are, what we want and what we deserve.
After all, everything we do for ourselves, we will do for others as well. If we are at peace, it will be possible to secure peace. If we feel good about who we are, it will be possible to accept others more easily. If we take care of ourselves, we will also take care of the bonds with others.
Currently, there is a collective desire for display. Many people want to show their personal lives to the public and feel it’s worth it. There is also a lot of haste for intimacy with the couple, especially in relationships.
These private or vulnerable aspects of our lives should be better protected. To know how to love is also to have a little patience. Allow time for links to strengthen and the privacy field to expand.
They say everyone “carries their own cross. ” While this can be a dramatic way of looking at things, it’s essentially true. We will never fully understand the battles a person wages every day.
What we can do is take that into account to understand that everyone has their own difficulties and that this creates tensions and conflicts, it is not necessary for the other person to constantly explain their discomfort and emptiness to understand them, even if everything is not as pleasant as it could be.
Human relations are not commercial contracts that involve total fairness in all circumstances. On the contrary. The dominant note is asymmetry, inequality. A complete union is never achieved.
There are times when one gives more than the other and soon the opposite can happen, so we cannot control everything and demand that we be equaled in the same proportion when we give something, know how to love is to give our best and give our best. accept what the other can and wants to give us.
Each romantic relationship ends at a certain time. The presence of other people is always temporary in our lives, sooner or later, and for many reasons, there will come a time when we will no longer have your business.
That’s why it’s important to learn to say goodbye to your partner, the pain that this entails is not solved by avoiding new bonds of love or trying to perpetuate them beyond reason, losing who you love is a reality from which no one escapes and it is important to know how to accept it.
These lessons to know how to love are tricks that not all apply at the same time, they should be seen as guides and not as standards, trying to follow them is enough, even if we can not meet them 100%. what love is all about: working to be better and making the people around us better, too.