There are several types of fake friends who are like the dark side of the Moon, at first we are dazzled by their charms and benevolent attentions, but little by little we realize that other side, in which the cavities of an interested character live. This arid and desolate affectivity that, almost without realizing it, robs our minds. These are profiles that we should probably be able to identify as soon as possible, especially for the sake of our emotional health.
Friendship is often said to be the best ingredient in life. Love is, too, there is no doubt. But what a good friend offers sometimes transcends affective and family ties, so this fabric built on complicity, common experiences and intense trust is what gives us a source of eternal energy and, above all, quality of life.
- “Those who think themselves to be good and useful are those who.
- Out of envy.
- Wish you all the ills.
- -Lucca Capiotto-.
However, it is inevitable that from time to time some of these specimens will be so common in our social contexts, where interest and selfishness are camouflaged under the guise of the brightest friendship. And we fall, of course we fall. Because in our natural innocence, we always believe that the primary purpose of any good friendship is to provide happiness, support and well-being.
Until it finally happens. Disappointments, small lies, constant contempt and the most impressive manipulations arise, whether or not we like one of those kinds of false friends that we didn’t see coming, but that we should let go as soon as possible for our health. dignity?
One of the first types of fake friends we tend to meet very early in our lives is the “social climber. “We found these friends in elementary school, high school, college and certainly in the workplace.
It is these people who build friendships with one goal: to gain positions in the social context, so it is common for these people in the school phase to seek to reach out to the most popular students or who get the best grades. of the professional context, they will not hesitate to humiliate and manipulate in any situation to win positions.
Most people will remember some case of this kind of false friendship, we are talking about people who are always close in the age of tranquility and well-being, when they are part of some last minute plan, celebration or proposal. arises a problem or situation in which we would appreciate your support and interest, disappear like the wind after closing a window?
If there is one thing that characterizes a healthy friendship it is this friend who seeks to offer well-being at all times, makes us feel good about his presence, feel the security that we will not be judged or criticized and that after a few hours with that person, we will do better than before.
However, this does not happen with fake friends, with them it is common to come home worse than before, in fact, a very common kind of false friendship is one that has the love to look for mistakes, drawing attention to every mistake we make. do and also judge day by day. This kind of dynamic creates significant emotional distress.
“Are you doing everything right, don’t these things happen to you like they happen to me?” are you still very lucky??It is these kinds of phrases that false friends who envy us in their being often repeat.
However, the truth is that they have low self-esteem, which leads them to this kind of unhealthy interaction for both parties.
This characteristic of false friendship is both curious and common. It manifests itself as follows: we have people who encourage us to overcome ourselves, to conquer things, but when that happens, far from being happy for us, they walk away or feel uncomfortable.
Behind such situations hides, once again, a clear low self-esteem, these people will always feel more comfortable with us while we are at the same level, in the same conditions, however, any spark of success or overtaking stands out. them, plunges them into contradiction and discomfort.
If you buy a mobile phone without a doubt one of your fake friends will want to buy a much better one, if you start going to the gym be careful, he or she will also start to surpass your progress. be better than you in everything you do, for any purpose or in any achievement.
These kinds of false friends act as enemies, a persecutory and vengeful shadow that will try to be better than us in any realm of our lives.
The manipulative friend is that discreet but relentless guy who, almost inadvertently, holds the puppet threads to manipulate us as he pleases for a while. Sometimes he will use victimism, other emotional blackmail and other lies, as well as many other Machiavellian strategies to get our hands on what we want at all times.
So how long are we going to allow this kind of manipulative action will depend on our affection for that person, the fact that he is a lifelong friend, a childhood friend with whom we have already lived so many moments?Put an end to the emotional bond that has accompanied us for so many years?It can be difficult, but few things are as destructive as carrying the influence of someone who, in fact, does not love us and wants our evil.
In conclusion, as we have already seen, there are many types of false friends: what is critical, what betrays, what does gossip do?, we could describe countless types. However, the most important thing about all of this is, in addition to identifying, how to treat these people.
Sometimes it is not necessary to break that bond, sometimes it is enough to clarify things, set limits and even stimulate personal growth and self-esteem of this friend so that he can create healthier relationships.