Of course, you may have sometimes seen many couples arguing several times in their daily lives, even disrespecting each other. Do you agree with me that in the face of such a situation we ask ourselves: why do they stay together?
Things aren’t always what they seem in a relationship. We know well that: “Everything that shines is not gold. “
- In intimacy.
- People tend to look very little like what we actually see in their daily lives.
- For example.
- If we look at a partner.
- The person who seems to be more dependent may be the dominant person in the relationship and play backwards.
- Paper to what we perceive as spectators.
It is true that when we have problems or perceive negative situations, our rational part reacts by avoiding such experiences simply to survive them, but now there are many studies that show anger and fear as a form of bonding.
Even taking into account the results of these surveys, we can say that sometimes anger can be more powerful in keeping unhappy couples together than passion itself.
When we have a relationship, we look for characteristics that make it a harmonious experience, but that sentimental argument is not always obtained, assuming that a difficult relationship is built and maintained by both parties, today we tell you what are the 7 reasons why unhappy couples continue together.
1. The feeling of guilt. There are people who remain in a relationship because of the presence of guilt that would arise if they left their partner, they are usually situations that generate a feeling of pity towards the other person.
2. Power games. When there is an unequal distribution of work or any other situation within a relationship, the person who is not so active in the relationship usually depends on the other, letting himself be emotionally carried away, in this situation the person in question will feel lost without the other, who keeps the role of command within the relationship.
Network express how you really feel or think. Despite the image others give us, all we see is not ‘how it looks’. Try that on yourself.
You’ll remember a multitude of times when you felt very sick or emotionally devastated, but you kept your composure and neutrality so you wouldn’t lose your job, a relationship, or just don’t hurt the person you have or had on your side, or yourself.
If in a relationship we do not feel and act on our values, or if our partner does not act in a positive way, we may feel frustrated and angry with ourselves, simply by allowing such a situation. When this anger is projected onto our partner, We may feel temporarily relieved, but after this explosion, we behave as usual, thus generating a vicious circle.
Thus, hiding, disguising or not saying what we think or feel will cause us to maintain a relationship, sometimes “unreal”.
4. Couples reach so-called “agreements” but do not formally express them. Making agreements between two people, but never formally spoken, can make the relationship dangerous when the purpose of these silent agreements is to allow and/or avoid habits such as infidelity. , overspending, bad behavior? Therefore, good verbal and nonverbal communication is essential in a transparent and truthful relationship at all times.
5. Si there’s abuse, it’s because there’s someone in the relationship who thinks they deserve it. In most cases, adults participate in relationships voluntarily, whether they are in poor health or not, as there may be hidden rewards for both parties. The most common reasons to continue such a relationship, are they usually children, finances, time spent, shame for separating, religion from both?
Similarly, if we find ourselves in a relationship where there is emotional abuse, a member may think that he or she deserves to be abused, a situation that could change if this individual internalizes the message that he or she does not deserve to be emotionally abused by their partner. .
With this new way of feeling and thinking, you will learn to say no and develop a healthy self-esteem, necessary to overcome the situation. In the end, this person will be aware that no negative situation, misunderstanding or damage caused justifies his misfortune.
6. Hopes and times. Things can change, it’s true, but that’s not usually the habit, especially when the awkward situation has been around for a long time.
There are many people who prefer to stick to hope and time, to justify the continuation of their relationship, but the truth is that if they take too long to be dissatisfied, change will be more complicated if there is no commitment to change the situation and an active attitude on both sides to achieve it.
7. – Feeling scared and insecure at the possibility of leaving the relationship, many times people decide to maintain the relationship they already have, even if they are not happy, for fear of making the wrong decision or for insecurity that they do not have. know what life will be like without the other.
Emotionally healthy people know how to use their own tools in a positive way.
When we are aware of all the emotional characteristics and situations that can lead us to hang out and maintain a negative relationship, we may be able to overcome the fear of being alone with our own frustrations and insecurities. To know yourself is to be aware of one’s own barriers and, better yet, to feel free to love and to be loved.