A marriage becomes toxic when at least one member suffers more than is happy, discomfort becomes a routine and a healthy emotional connection becomes impossible, the line between a toxic and problematic marriage is very fine, therefore we must be attentive to the signs. indicating toxicity.
The existence of emotional dependence, possessive behavior, jealousy, manipulation or frequent arguments indicate that the relationship is not going well, in addition, these behaviors generally indicate inequality between the members of the couple, one gains ground and exercises control, while the other remains in the shadow and can be manipulated.
- A healthy relationship provides pleasure.
- Happiness and well-being.
- On the other hand.
- In a toxic marriage.
- One or both parties feel unhappy.
- Sad or anxious most of the time they spend with the other person.
- This suffering causes great emotional distress in both the couple and the family.
- The most characteristic signs are.
“They made us believe that we are an orange half, and that life only makes sense when we find the other half. Haven’t we been told that we were born whole, that no one in life deserves the responsibility to complete what we lack?-John Lennon-
Emotional dependence is a psychological trap that leads to the possibility of being happy being with someone else, dependents are able to recognize the abuse and contempt they suffer on a daily basis, but they do not have the ability to stop being glued to their partner. . They ask for forgiveness even for things they have not done, show obedience, and take care of all sorts of details to make the other person feel comfortable, even if that means acting to their detriment. Your intention is to win the approval and affection of others. .
Perhaps the basis of emotional dependence is the low self-esteem that leads the addict not to feel up to their partner, these people are critical of the extreme and therefore feel guilty even for the contempt they may suffer from their partner. What we know is that contempt for each other increases almost in proportion to their attitude of submission.
The dependent repeatedly returns to the toxic bond, just as an addict starts consuming again. The situation is getting worse and worse, the contempt of the couple increases and the dignity and self-esteem of the dependent decreases.
There is not enough love capable of filling the void of a person who does not love himself.
Love and dependence are at odds; if they coexist, they are destroyed, if this happens, even if the relationship persists, love will darken into a need to be well, to be happy, this will lead to overcoming the limits of respect and obsession with control. which, with the need for approval, will dominate the relationship.
Conflicts always occur in romantic relationships. There is nothing wrong with having different opinions and expressing them to your partner, the problem arises when they become routine and the limits cease to exist, here are seven signs to identify a toxic marriage.
All these signs create an environment of discomfort that prevents a healthy bond, does not harm anyone, but they do much damage, so much so that they can become pathological, so learning to be emotionally independent is so important. In this way, we will be happy without others needing to create well-being in a relationship.
Addiction sustains and manipulates, emotional independence gives wings to fly, let’s take care of ourselves and love to build quality bonds.
You can’t count on anyone to be happy, no relationship will give you peace you didn’t form in yourself.