Anger is a common step in the grieving process, however, there are people who are stagnant at this stage, who collapse emotionally and are stranded by the loss they have suffered.
It is not easy to manage all this confusing tangle of feelings, in which the irritation and misunderstanding of what happened change our personality and lead us to immerse ourselves in a very debilitating state.
- William Shakespeare said grief makes grief less profound.
- However.
- When someone is unable to make the step toward emotional explosion.
- That person becomes a stone that falls by his own weight into the deepest abyss of anguish.
Thus, among all the stages of grief defined by Elisabeth Kobler-Ross, it is quite possible that this second, characterized by anger and frustration, is the most problematic.
This phase defines the moment when the individual becomes fully aware of the death of this loved one, but instead of accepting it ends up rebelling, the mind begins to seek the culprit and feelings of injustice, resentment and anger are constant and profound. Rooted.
Emotions act like a furious wind that constantly shakes the clothes hanging on the clothesline, shakes them, distorts them, tries to remove them from the rope where they are attached.
The person wants to maintain control, but feels incapable, because anger is anger and often makes us something we are not.
Does the repressed pain hurt, damage the chest and be forced to multiply its strength?. – Ov-dio-
Anger arises in the process of grief in response to loss, we must not forget that this emotion, like anger, is an instinctive mechanism that helped humans react to what the brain interprets as a threat.
So what would have more impact than losing someone so important?The mark of pain is enormous and, as such, an answer arises.
Living this kind of reality is pretty normal. In addition, studies such as that conducted by Dr. George A. Bonanno, columbia University in the United States, says there is no “regulatory” duel.
Therefore, although we take into account the steps set by Dr. Kobler-Ross in the past, each person treats and suffers his duel in a particular way.
Despite this, it is worth mentioning that a complicated duel, such as frozen or late bereavement, when the loss lasts for years and is not treated, can lead to depression, so let us see how anger manifests itself in the grieving process.
When we lose someone, it’s common for us to ask each other a lot of questions. A very common situation is where, as if it were an angry complaint, we wonder why that particular person and not another.
Why did this have to happen to my father?Was he still that young? If he was so good and so eager to live, why did he have to leave?
This type of idea generates fixed and obsessive points in the mind of the person, which is stuck in his grieving process, the obsession with what happened, the search for explanations and even the culprits, is a common thing that feeds one’s own anger.
Anger in the grieving process causes the person to suffer, in many cases, hypersensitivity and suddenly, any unexpected stimulus, any news or sudden fact affects you intensely.
The person overestimates everything negatively, everything affects him uncontrolled and even devastatingly.
One thing we need to understand about anger and anger is that they have a transformative power, they change us, they make us someone we are not and we don’t like.
Motivation disappears. What used to awaken our passion ceases to interest us, patience and interest disappear. We have stopped communicating with people and, at the same time, empathy decreases because suffering forces us to focus our attention only on ourselves.
Anger in the grieving process also results in psychosomatic diseases, such as stomach pain, physical and mental fatigue, headaches, insomnia and a greater tendency to infections are recurrent in these situations.
On the other hand, it is common to notice indicators of depression that, if left untreated, can get worse over time.
One of the greatest dangers of feeling angry in such situations is that it can lead us to behave as dangerous as they are harmful to our own health.
Are there people who consume alcohol, gambling, or any other behavior that allows them to do so?Pain of loss. They are certainly very complicated situations.
Therefore, in the face of this kind of reality, we must be aware that psychological therapy is not only advisable, but is the only way to regain control of our lives and allow us to move forward again.
Thus, the strategies generally implemented are
It should also be noted that this type of therapie varies greatly depending on the needs of each person.
It is a process that also requires time and a strong link between the person and the psychologist, however, the success rate is high. Therefore, it is possible to overcome such situations.