In many cases communication does not go as we would like, misunderstandings and conflicts arise that obscure relationships and cause frustration, in this context affirmative techniques are simple procedures that help us protect our rights and not harm those of others.
Knowing and practicing these simple techniques will make them part of our natural repertoire of answers. Initially, its use is artificial, but this feeling, as we have said, will disappear with practice.
- Assertiveness is a style of communication in which the person is able to express his wishes.
- Needs and opinions without harming the interlocutor.
- This we can better understand if we consider that there are three basic types of communication:.
Far from being an abstract concept, self-affirmation can and should be applied in practice of our relationship with others, for this there is a basic sequence that we can use when we want to resolve a conflict situation:
It consists of repeating your statement several times, in a calm tone and without mocking.
? -We’re always late because of you
-I had to leave work later because I had a meeting.
“You always do the same thing.
-I repeat that I had to leave work later for the meeting
This technique is used when the other person criticizes us or advises us with the sole perverse intention of manipulating us.
In this case, we will give a partial reason to our interlocutor, but leaving the final decision in our hands.
You never go out with us, you leave your friends behind
“Are you right, I don’t go out with you anymore, but my new work schedule doesn’t allow me to do it?”
In this situation we will accept the error of our behavior, but not of our person, that is, we deshare from the label that the other tries to impose on us, despite the acceptance of our failure.
? – You always do everything in disarray, you have no consideration
? It’s true, I didn’t organize the house because I rushed out this morning, but isn’t that usually the same on other occasions?
This technique is often used when the other person is too upset or angry, it is about ignoring the reason for the discussion and postponing it for another more appropriate time.
I feel like right now you’re very angry and you can end up hurting yourself with words, is it better to talk later, when you’re calmer?.
These are just a few examples of the many techniques that exist to implement assertiveness in our lives.
As we can see, the key is to maintain a serene, serene and respectful tone, avoiding provocations, but defending our point of view. With practice, assertiveness can become our best ally in communication.