We need to understand the importance of authenticity in our lives and in our relationships. When we know ourselves and show who we are, we are much more likely to be able to maintain healthy relationships with others.
Love me like this: free, messy, daring, chaotic, imperfect, always brilliant. Don’t want me docile, submissive or quiet, don’t idealize the love of brochures or erase those nuances that make us unique to you and me. If you want me like this, is it better to let me go, give me back my world, my chains, my nutritional loneliness, my roots?
- Benjamin Franklin wisely said that in our world there are three particularly difficult things.
- One was steel.
- The other the diamond and the third was to know oneself.
- It is clear that such a task is not easy.
- That immersing ourselves in the reefs of our insecurities.
- Our fears.
- Our concerns.
- Our virtues and our shadows.
- We need a patient and.
- At the same time.
- Courageous profession.
“A person must know himself. Even if it doesn’t serve to uncover the truth, at least it’s useful as a rule of life, and therefore there’s nothing better?. – Blaise Pascal-
However, few things are as valuable as defining these personal boundaries, as well as conquering private spaces and self-known to maintain genuine loyalty to ourselves, only then can we establish more satisfying emotional relationships, only in this way will we form a more integral existence according to our values, where behaviors and thoughts are always in strict balance.
Now, there is one fact that we must take into account. Recently, Dr. Yi Nan Wang, a well-known personality psychology researcher, explained in one of his works that most couples “match” to achieve better harmony with their loved one. A desire for communion that begins to show a more docile attitude and prioritizes the needs of the other while taking ours to the drawer of oblivion.
So what Dr. Wang suggests to us is that we can develop what he called “balanced authenticity. “It is a concept based on Erikson’s psychosocial theory, which reminds us that any mutually satisfactory relationship goes through a phase in which someone has been able to delineate his identity.
Was it that in the past you were docile, manageable, accommodating?Most of us went for a few years because we were brought up, because others wanted to. In this way, of course, we were easier to handle, to control; we have been able to adapt to the gears of a society where sometimes having one’s voice is little more than audacity.
All this makes us fear or doubt to show our true self, in the same way, and if it is clear that these thoughts, voices and feelings are essential to our integrity, we say no, that they are better not seen. , not to be heard, or to be too noticeed. Are we afraid of being rejected by them, are we afraid to contradict others, to harm their feelings, to break the schemes that have been made in our person?
However, what state is our pattern or personal identity in?He’s being boycotted. We become our own emotional sniper because we are unable to practice and understand the importance of healthy authenticity. We become victims of our own ingenuity by thinking that being authentic can harm those around us.
Show us the world as we are, as we think and feel, that this is not an act of aggression, on the contrary. With this, we define boundaries and create more sincere, healthy and dignified spaces.
It was Aristotle who once said that healthier authenticity goes through what he called the “golden balance,” where being honest doesn’t have to hurt or provoke rejection, because what we actually practice is honesty.
Dr. Yi Nan Wang of Beijing Normal University recently created the interesting one?Air? (Authenticity on the relationship scale), which aims to measure the level of authenticity of the two members of a relationship, one thing that has been concluded is that one of the keys to the social well-being of the population is precisely that individuals are able to practice the personal honesty mentioned above and the authentic sense of identity where we do not boycott or let others do so.
So, the 9 elements that make up it? AIRS? And what should we answer with a?Yes? Or a? No?Are:
We certainly already had a little idea of how the scale is marked, however, it can be said that it measures three dimensions:
In conclusion, it is not only in relationships that we must be able to practice and understand the importance of a balanced authenticity, where honesty is combined with respect, freedom with affiliation and self-esteem with the partner’s own growth. To be practiced in all areas of our lives, where it is not worth being docile or sumissive, but illustrated, with character, unique and wonderful.