Today, we maintain a pace of life full of tasks that, as a side effect, fill us with responsibilities. Do we constantly say “I should,” “I must do” or should I have left?These seemingly innocent phrases leave us with a series of feelings of obligation and responsibility that can be truly harmful. Then a question arises: can being very responsible be negative?
Having responsibilities is good and necessary, but if we don’t know how to handle all that this entails, we can fall into a series of thoughts that determine how we behave with ourselves and others.
- In fact.
- This increased sense of responsibility has been linked to a wide variety of consequences: anxiety.
- Depression.
- Obsessions.
- Eating disorders.
- Communication problems.
- Etc.
To be responsible, by definition, is to be aware of and commit to one’s obligations, however, a personality in which the sense of responsibility is too great can be a sign of other psychological aspects that can become pitfalls.
Responsibility is to want to do things and get it right, of course we all like to be effective and get good results, but there are people who seek true perfection.
The problem is that the concept of perfection is subjective and is based on what everyone considers ideal, so those who are perfectionists often set a high goal and, until they reach it, will not complete the task.
For this reason, they spend a lot of time focusing on their goals, developing rigid or even controlling behaviors, the problem is that the perfectionist really spends all this time suffering if he does not achieve it, as a result, he ends up promoting it. insecurity and mistrust.
They will rarely be satisfied with the result and any failure will be seen as a real personal failure.
Very responsible people generally require a lot of themselves. They want to take on a multitude of tasks, mainly to make sure everything is done the “right” way. This makes them very demanding. They want to overcome all adversity and fulfill all obligations, creating levels of self-demand that can overcome their true abilities.
Thus, being demanding and responsible can become a trap, the goal may be to overcome you or others, rather than fulfill certain obligations, in this case if there is a disadvantage or the result is a little less than expected, the person will face feelings of frustration, shame and guilt.
Having obligations means meeting certain expectations. Whether it’s doing an important task or some other activity, it means someone is waiting for us to do something and, of course, someone perfectionist, demanding and responsible can’t fail in their task.
Similarly, a very responsible person sets high expectations, as in the previous aspects, setting expectations has, on the one hand, the advantage of contributing to the achievement of a goal, but, on the other hand, the risk of not achieving it. it turns out that the result is unlikely to be exactly as expected and, after an effort, the consequences can be fatal.
Responsibility inevitably leads to a more fixed idea of what is right and to have more concerns, so, like everything else, when it reaches high levels, it creates a number of consequences that, if left one) managed, can cause a lot of damage.
Concerns mean nothing more than anticipating future events, so focusing on accomplishing or not fulfilling a task, achieving the desired result, desire for excellence, etc. , ends up generating a general sense of anxiety.
A joint study by the University of Hiroshima and the University of Central Florida found that responsibility is the common denominator for generalized anxiety disorders and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
These scientists identified three main types of responsibility: the subjective need to care for and protect others, the excessive effort to find a solution to a problem, and feelings of guilt, of feeling responsible for everything.
In the same study, they found that the latter type was the one that generated the most anxiety among the participants, it is about constantly reflecting on the impact that the actions themselves have on the environment, generating, in turn, more concern and responsibility. .
Overly responsible people, as noted above, also have high levels of self-demand. So it’s common to see that these people are also very demanding of others.
Their rigid beliefs and strong perception of what is appropriate lead them to expect the same from others, and they will hardly understand other ways of acting than their own. That’s why few people live up to their expectations.
In short, hyper-responsible people have a distorted and closed view of reality, assuming obligations that may not even exist and requiring them to fulfill them, so it is necessary to prioritize and learn to discern what we can assume and our true capabilities. And above all, understand how far our limits go.