Relationships have changed. It is not so important now to start a family and have children, but to pay more attention to our well-being, trying to curb the inertia that can lead us to fulfill the customs of the past and not with what we really want. , the opposite is usually true, and as we do the opposite of the usual, we do not do what we want.
Despite the rebellion against what is considered backward, we are still afraid of being single, fear known as anuptaphobia, a fear that usually appears especially over the years, and disappears as soon as we have a partner by our side.
- It is true that we are more independent and that relationships have changed.
- Sexual intercourse does not necessarily imply that there is love between two people.
- And children move to the background.
- So much so that many women have children between the age of 30 and 40.
- But are we really that independent and?.
You may be very focused on your professional life and relationships may not be a serious concern right now, but when the time comes, especially as we get closer to 30, something starts to worry inside. The need to find a partner is evident in many, people.
If you’re in a situation like this, you may not have wondered “why I want a partner” yet. You may find answers such as: how much it is possible to mature and grow in a relationship, to be able to share time with another person and to enrich yourself with their presence or to have stable support for good and bad times. But wait a minute, do you want to have a partner or be in a relationship?
These two issues are very important because of the different results they can bring. You may want to be in a relationship if you want to share your life with someone you love and experience all the positives of being with the person you love and be. be able to enjoy your time together. But if you want to have a partner, your goal is only to change your marital status.
You want to have a partner because you don’t want to be single, but that’s not a fair option, people who are eager to have a partner end up happy with the first option that appears to them, for them the main thing is not to fall in love, but to get out of that state of celibacy that I so crave. The fear of being single is real and draws obsessions from this situation.
You’ve certainly heard of emotional addiction. In this type of problems the person is unable to live if there is no one by his side, the fear of being single prevents us from being independent or enjoying our own loneliness, the latter scares us even more and makes us conformists in the field of relationships.
You may have developed some fear of loneliness from your experiences, that your self-esteem is very low and that self-confidence is distinguished by their absence, but wanting to have a partner to calm everything is nothing. without trying to cover a problem with a different definition and solution with a veil.
The fear of being single makes us unhappy and, most of the time, we escape that fear by undergoing toxic relationships, inside we want the ideal person to arrive, but as seems impossible, we embark more than once on adventure. , without seeking to be with ourselves and enjoy our loneliness.
In this way we avoid thinking about what is really happening to us, for fear of being single, so we often hide this fear so as not to see it, but the truth is that it continues to terrify us. Continue to observe happy couples and you will still want to be in your place.
“Being single means leaving behind the illusion that there is someone who complements you and start taking care of your own life. Omar Phatak-
It’s hard to deal with the problems we have, but it’s also important to avoid situations that won’t get you anywhere. If you don’t know how to be alone and that’s why you want a couple at all costs, without “power” avoid it, “stop for a moment and think about the question,” why do I want a partner?”It’s not that hard to be alone for a while and this will help you solve anything that hurts you.
Only then can you find the person who will fill your life with happiness and joy, it may appear at the moment when you least expect it and without chasing it, or maybe not, but that should not be a cause for concern.
Focus first on yourself and take the time you have to dedicate yourself, the fear of being single is nothing more than a social fear that feeds on the need for relationships, on social networks, to avoid isolation and to be able to change our mentality and social status into “dates”.