Are they our children? And at the same time is not it? Extensions of ourselves. They are, in the sense that they inherit our physical and psychological characteristics; and they are not, in the sense that the whole is not equal to the sum of the parts, which makes each individual a unique combination that must be honored and respected.
Unfortunately, this distinction is not always so clear and some parents see their children as a mirror in which they want to be reflected in the same way. The result? Frustration on both sides.
- Ideally.
- Starting from the birth of the baby.
- Should be seen as a unique being.
- With his own identity.
- Worthy of being accepted unconditionally.
- Taking this as a milestone.
- It is very important to notice what your natural inclinations are.
Do you like to draw?Expose you to experiences that encourage this talent, such as buying books and drawing materials, taking you to age-appropriate art exhibitions, enrolling you in courses or drawing workshops?
It’s also important to talk to your children to help them figure out the best ways to channel their talents and interests. Finally, recognizing and praising your skills and accomplishments is a valuable incentive to make your precious natural gifts flourish and grow.
From an early age we must be careful not to project our own unsatisfied desires onto children, for example, there are parents who may have the frustrated dream of being famous artists and want to achieve it through their children, then subject them to a harsh theater routine , music, dance, auditions and others, that do not correspond to the interests, abilities or vocation of your children.
However, you cannot permanently change the course of nature without this revolt sooner or later, which can take many forms, from anxiety disorders, from driving or poor academic performance, to substance abuse, depression and suicide, in the most severe cases.
And the truth is that there is no need for so much suffering, just let it be what you want to be, even if it is not what you have dreamed of yourself. Better yet, try to channel your own dreams; The story is full of people who fulfill their dreams and goals at any age.
“Does he have the same grumpy temper as your grandfather?Is it identical to me, doesn’t it have the capacity for numbers?They are examples of common expressions, capable of limiting children’s expectations about themselves. And while there are similarities within the family, it is worth trying to highlight what makes each child unique and irreplaceable, in this way we will stimulate the free development of its full potential without unnecessarily embarrassing it with other models.
Although it is a little clichéd, it is also true that children do not belong to us, they are only a privilege that we are granted to guide them temporarily, so that they may fulfill their unique mission in this world. So, like a box of surprises, do we let them exercise their unique talents one by one, trust them and allow them to create their own path?
Image courtesy of Edgar Barany