Today, there is a curious new social label called “Mothers’ Agenda”. Some of our readers may feel identified, or they may know people with this type of behavior very well. They are mothers (sometimes also parents) accustomed to combing their hair. your children’s schedules, whether six or sixteen.
When the children come home, these mothers review each of the tasks, tasks and tests that the children have planned, it is obvious that it is important to be aware of these types of issues, but it is not necessary to keep track of all the data. of each academic obligation of children, with this what we have achieved is that, far from developing adequate autonomy in them, we end up creating absolutely dependent people.
- “But if I didn’t touch my foot.
- He/she wouldn’t do anything?”they say often.
- However.
- The child also did not have the opportunity to try to do things alone.
Do we have the mothers’ agenda here? And the ‘helicopter parents’, the parents who ‘fly’ their children’s lives, supervising, observing every move. Basically, they prevent children from becoming mature and self-sufficient adults, denying them opportunities, surrounding their personal spaces until they create a real bubble around them.
Something’s going on. According to experts, children now have less freedom than previous generations. Early childhood education professionals say that in kindergartens, children are a little more clumsy, they have not yet developed some of their motor function or fine motor skills.
An example of this can be seen in these parents who insist on taking their children in strollers, when they could already walk perfectly, however, they prefer to take their children like this, because it is more comfortable and what happens when they arrive at school. ? There are 6- and 8-year-olds who go from one curse to another because they don’t get what they want, because they can’t resist frustration or denial.
What’s behind overprotection?Basically, the fear of parents to have something wrong with their children, the almost obsessive need to dominate all aspects of the child’s life, aiming to offer them a perfect life without trauma or mistakes.
Well, sometimes the inconceivable idea of being the perfect father or mother ends up going the other way. We create a complex and traumatic relationship of hatred in our children, perfection in education does not exist.
It’s just about being there when it’s needed, serving as a guide, support, offering bonds of love and care where, day by day, we can foster the emotional maturity of our children.
Sooner or later, that day will come. The child may be 12 or 20 years old, but eventually the time will come when the protective bubble bursts; the person will go out to discover the world, and he will be very afraid of everything that is outside the bubble, of everything that surrounds and builds the “real world”, that world from which he has always been protected.
The person will feel anxious and anxious, being the object of the gaze of others. It’s quite possible that you’re being bullied at school or responding to these threats, being well aware of your vulnerability. A curious fact that many experts show is that a large percentage of overprotected children are more likely to develop allergies.
This is due to their emotions and stress, which leads to a weaker immune system, where either disease is common.
And, in turn, these diseases are an even more justified reason to continue exercising overprotection, creating a kind of karmic cycle that never ends, however, this does not mean that children are desperately doomed to be eternally immature and therefore unhappy.
If they have good self-esteem and know how to react on time, many of them will be able to break these bandages and walk safely, move forward and learn for themselves.
Today we live in a world where information is accessible to all, our parents are, for a while, that protective bubble, but life goes beyond our comfort zone and we must dare to go out.
It is often said that teachers, psychologists and educators push children towards the door of maturity, but sometimes parents are on the other side, preventing this from happening.
There’s no need to be afraid. Children do not collapse and must grow up with learning opportunities, that is where we must offer them our trust, always guiding them, but without breaking down the barriers of overprotection.