Falling into a situation of chronic self-sacrifice, in which we can end up getting lost, carries significant risks, such as human beings, it can be normal to want to invest our time and energy in the people and causes that exhaust us more than we can. take care of.
Therefore, to think that personal beliefs and values are generally not sacrificed for the desires and opinions of others can be a very naive idea.
- Self-denial and abandonment of the ideas and needs of others are factors that.
- As is noted in collective dynamics.
- Do not seem to worry us.
- Although perhaps we should be concerned.
“If you look at my success, look at my sacrifice too. ” – Bernardo Stamateas-
Sacrificing for others, giving the other, or others, huge amounts of our being, often tends unconditionally to create their realities:
Sacrifice occurs at a time when, in interaction with another being or situation, we must renounce personal well-being or immediate attention to ourselves; self-sacrifice goes further, as it involves the release of a part of ourselves.
Psychologically, self-sacrifice is the abandonment of personal interests to preserve someone else’s well-being.
Since self-sacrifice often leads to the denial of certain personal needs or desires, as well as a certain pleasure or purpose, it is, in essence, a renunciation of a precious and important part of ourselves. A renunciation of our dignity and even our identity.
On the one hand, the act of self-sacrifice can lead us to give more value to something or to someone, at a given time or situation, than to ourselves, which would advocate for our altruism and solidarity.
Altruism, while often a trait appreciated by society, can take an extreme form when self-sacrifice is exceeded in intensity or duration, and also when it steals excess well-being from the selfless person.
As a result, self-sacrifice can sometimes be dysfunctional or unsuitable for the person who is completely abandoned.
The list of examples of forms of self-sacrifice is endless: from people who sacrifice themselves without thinking twice for a specific cause, to parents who practically give their lives for their children, to people who give everything to their partner, delivering their own. happiness and social assistance.
Many of these dynamics can, in a moderate amount, not be problematic and can be considered common and normal to some extent.
Despite this, when does a person accept self-sacrifice at chronic levels and make it a way to connect and face life?And not in something specific to an event or a specific person?He risks losing some of his personal essence.
Self-sacrifice implies at least a minimum degree of self-denial or self-disregard; if this renunciation leads to a change in the hierarchy of values of the person and is no longer considered important to herself, the situation can approach the limits of pathology. .
Can chronic self-sacrifice represent pathological altruism?give too much of ourselves when the person stops appreciating himself and therefore ceases to be treated as a priority. I’d be relegated to the background.
This erosion of personal importance can mean that one’s own needs are never met and are practically at the mercy of others, which, unsurprisingly, could lead to the development of negative feelings towards oneself.
This can lead to a state of incapacity of self-awareness, reversal of the scale of values, or violation of a person’s rational judgment and self-esteem. In short: chronic self-sacrifice can eliminate from the person the factors that define their own essence as an individual.
“People rarely see the shaky and painful stages with which the most insignificant success is achieved. “Anne Sullivan.
There are important signs to see if yours is a case of chronic self-denial or not, including:
One strategy that some authors, such as Ayn Rand, have proposed to combat this trend of self-sacrifice – which is also generally reinforced by society itself – is to strengthen its moral ambition.
Basically, it would be based on convincing us that we have earned the right to give ourselves maximum value, to think that, for us, there is nothing more important than our own being.
In short, not to get lost in chronic self-sacrifice, one of the most effective antidotes is to really care about our own interests.
The solution might be to practice, so to speak, a controlled, rational and non-aggressive selfishness, if you can avoid it, there is no reason to get lost.