Who hasn’t received any criticism? At one point, we were all victims of people who were jealous of our work, who were irritated by our own way of acting or being, who simply felt bad and needed to blame someone else for their negativity. place once.
“Even your worst enemy can’t do you as much damage as your own thoughts. -Bouddha-
- Criticism can do us a lot of damage.
- Depending on the day and strength of our own self-esteem.
- We can ignore it or let it affect us.
- Yes.
- You are responsible for how all this negativity that has inflicted on you affects you.
- Because you cannot control how others.
- Act.
- But you can control the extent to which you’re going to let it affect you.
We’re not all the same. Your best friend may not be affected by what others say, but you are. To change that, it’s important to start looking at the situation in perspective. Why would anyone criticize you with the intention of hurting you?.
We often project insecurities and fears into others, we have to shoot as poisonous darts to others, because they are not satisfied or do not receive a solution, in this way we try to feel better with ourselves, we do not realize that instead of solving the problem, we are running away from it.
Every time someone puts all their negativity on you, thinks of it as a defense mechanism, this person tries to defend himself from all those impulses, actions and thoughts that he does not want to recognize as his own, your inner denial makes you throw them. so you don’t have to face them, accept them and solve them.
“I’m on a diet of bad thoughts, destructive people and things that don’t suit me. -Paulo Coelho-
Let’s look at an example. Think of romantic relationships, where one member accuses the other person of being unfaithful, without actually having any evidence to suspect it is true. There may be many explanations for this situation.
What really happens in this situation is that the accuser has had unfaithful thoughts, but does not accept them because he considers them negative, in his need to feel better project this insecurity in his partner: he transfers his fear of thoughts. who can’t drive.
But what matters here is how you’re going to act, are you going to let all this negativity thrown at you dominate you, if you stay with that person who’s making offensive comments with you, if instead of refusing to do something you want, do it because if you don’t they’ll look at you or criticize you, do you expect to feel good?
Sometimes it’s hard to stay calm in front of someone who doesn’t behave well with you, however, you have to make an effort, as this will be your best weapon to prevent the other person’s fears and insecurities from affecting you. You can also better evaluate the reasons that can lead you to do so. At best, you can even get something positive from the situation.
Do you know the best way not to worry too much about a situation like this?Laughing may seem absurd, but it will be a fundamental tool. A smile at a difficult time can help us, believe it or not. practice today and you’ll find out how any criticism or judgment will have a much smaller emotional impact.
Also, remember that a criticism is only an opinion, therefore, this should not affect you in an important way, because not everyone can have the same opinion about a circumstance or action, also, how many times has someone not criticized you without really knowing it you?
It is also very important that you pay attention to the behavior of the person who criticizes you, usually people who project needs or thoughts in others are very emotional, their words are overflowing with emotions that make everything more serious than it really is. .
“The best thing about criticism is not that it responds to the will to offend, but to freedom of judgment. -Fernando Sánchez Draga-
When this happens, you will face a person whose words are not addressed to you, but to herself, projects her fears and insecurities on you, but you have no problem, you do nothing wrong, it is she who is afraid to accept what she does not consider right, but who floods her thoughts.
Throughout your life, you will meet many people who fit this description, many will be toxic people who can fill your life not only with negativity, but also with harmful and harmful emotions and feelings that go against you. To happen is to stay calm and trust yourself.