Emotional ambivalence is a complex kind of emotion; contradiction and tension inhabit it, an example of this is certainly when we love and hate someone at about the same time, we have a great affection for a close person, but at the same time we feel some resentment, you love a friend, but do you feel that this relationship hurts us?
Why do people suffer from these kinds of conflicting and even negative feelings?Is that normal or does it respond to some kind of imbalance?The answer is simple: we face a perfectly normal kind of reality that, in turn, defines the great complexity of the human being in emotional matters.
- This topic also arouses great interest from the scientific community.
- Which has conducted various research and studies on it.
- Something that.
- To us.
- May seem worthy of a novel.
- Corresponds.
- To neurologists.
- Psychiatrists and specialists in emotional psychology.
- To a fact that is a good example of the complexity of the emotional structure of our relationships.
For example, authors such as Frenk van Harreveld, from the Department of Social Psychology at the University of Amsterdam, noted in a study that emotional ambivalence not only determines how we feel, but it is also this internal complexity that leads us to behave in certain ways. An example: there are women who, during the post-specialty, experience a clear emotional ambivalence.
They love their newborn, but in a few moments, due to the high demand and dependence of the little one, they may experience a chaotic mixture of exhaustion, rejection, tenderness and fear that both define these first months between mother and child. see more information about that.
“Do you know that when I hate you it’s because I love you to the point of passion that unbalances my soul?”- Julie de Lespinasse–
Emotional ambivalence is felt (suffered or appreciated) by every human being at some point in his life, we know that when we talk about emotions it is common for names like Daniel Goleman or Paul Eckman to come to mind. It can be said that this topic has been studied since the early twentieth century.
It was psychiatrist Eugen Bleuler who, in 1911, described emotional ambivalence as “the simultaneous presence of two opposing feelings (attraction and revulsion), two opposite senses of will, in relation to the same object.
Since then, the field of psychology has constantly become interested in a subject that seems to structure different fields; Moreover, although emotional ambivalence is so common in our emotional relationships, social psychology has also become interested in this field in recent years. .
The reason? Many of the decisions we make are orchestrated by contradiction (I want to buy this, but now I can’t, I want this job in this country, but I dare not leave my house here, etc. ).
Emotional or emotional ambivalence creates a high level of discomfort and if there is one thing that the human brain does not like is the contradiction, the points that are not aligned.
The energy and wear and tear of this kind of dissonance is immense, so much so that we are often blocked by these feelings and realize the great love or affection we feel for something or someone, but at the same time we feel a certain exhaustion, rejection and even hatred.
We can love someone, but hate their behavior, their attitudes and even the way they treat us. Remember, in turn, our adolescence. This part of our life cycle is a constant contradiction, it is a search for experiences, it is fear, it is anxiety, it is both desire, intensity and anxiety, it is not easy to assume these kinds of internal contradictions, we are all aware of that.
We know that emotional or emotional ambivalence is synonymous with contradiction, now there is a positive effect on it that leads us to decide, clarify or even accept certain situations, the mother who is going through the complex period of postspecialty gradually assumes and gets used to her new reality.
When we love and hate someone at the same time, we strive to understand the reality of that feeling. Is the contradiction a natural thing in this passion we feel for our partner?Or maybe this hatred is a fact that I have to be aware of to make a decision?
Dr. Laura Rees of the University of Michigan conducted a study in 2013 to show us something interesting: emotional ambivalence promotes self-awareness. This discomfort is something that our brain needs to calm and solve, in fact, it has been shown that these kinds of contradictions increase our creativity, lead us to look for channels to think, evacuate and find original answers to solve the problem.
In conclusion, we can highlight a small aspect. Whenever we find ourselves in this kind of personal labyrinth in which we are pursued by an emotional contradiction, it is worth stopping, listening and understanding, perhaps there is something that we must solve or even assume.
Life itself is contradictory and feelings are even more contradictory. Loving is not easy and requires great responsibility as well as a commitment, first to oneself and then to others.