There are several situations that can cause a parent to leave their children’s lives, but how many emotions can children of emotionally absent parents have, why does the mother have to make up extraordinary stories about the father so as not to hurt children and vice versa??
Emotionally absent parents are parents who, in addition to their physical presence, perform no function, delegation of authority, imposition of limits, care and emotional support to their partner, act as indirect parents and cause a psychological absence capable of giving the child different emotional wounds.
- Emotionally absent parents leave traits in their children such as lack of law or authority.
- Or negative identification with the parent Growing up with a maternal or paternal figure who.
- Although unable to give love or gratitude.
- Leaves a void in the heart of a child who paves the way to build his world.
“The biggest disease today is not leprosy or tuberculosis, but the feeling of not being loved, not cared for and abandoned by all. “- Teresa of Calcutta-
An kindergarten teacher observed that a girl in her class was strangely sad and affectionate.
? What are you worried about? ? She asked
The girl replied:
My parents! Dad spends all day working so I can get dressed, eat and go to the best school in town. He also worked overtime to send me to college one day. And my mom spends all day cooking, cleaning, washing, ironing and shopping. you don’t have to worry
? So, what’s the problem? ? said the professor
Am I afraid they will try to escape? “The girl replied.
Children who grow up with emotionally absent parents are more likely to develop behavioral problems. These problems are often a shield that children use to protect their deepest feelings of abandonment, fear, and insecurity.
In these creative styles there is often an emotional detachment that generates insecurity when it comes to building relationships, there is mistrust and, therefore, the idea of projecting a large and effective burden on someone generates the fear of being betrayed, unrecognized or worse. , to feel ignored.
“Our emotions are there to feel, but not to dominate our lives, not to blind our vision, or to steal our future, or to extinguish our energy, because doing so will become toxic” – Bernardo Stamateas-
All these gaps can cause children raised in these absent environments to become emotionally dependent adults because they dare not cut certain bonds even if they are negative, for fear of abandonment or feeling alone, they prefer to hold on to the person, even if it is not appropriate, than have to lose someone again.
This creative model tends to establish toxic relationships with others, in need of affection and father figure, the person can integrate into an undesirable and toxic social core from which he cannot escape.
Feelings of hostility are often constant in relationships with others or with themselves, always defensively, pending attack, certainly one of the many consequences of having emotionally absent parents.
While parents may have no choice but to spend a lot of time away from home and away from their children, it is possible to maintain this necessary emotional connection, it is advisable that the little time they spend with them is exclusively for them, in the body. It is a bond between parents and children, the most significant in a person’s history.
For a good emotional upbringing of children you have to avoid thinking about paying the bills, shopping, among other things during this period, the main thing is to be connected and, in turn, enjoy moments like a meal where everyone can be present. or play a little with your kids with whatever you prefer.
There are many activities that do not involve an excessive investment of time, such as helping to cook, setting the table, organizing things at home, walking, watching a movie, going to a playground or the park, all depends on the quality of the connection formed.