We’ve all heard of empathy. In many cases, this is due to “the ability to put yourself in each other’s place. “However, this usually does not work very well in practice. While it is true that sometimes we put ourselves in each other’s shoes, in most cases we do so only because we agree with the person in front of us, that is, we sympathize with them.
Therefore, we could say that sympathy means accepting and sharing the values of the other person, we stand in solidarity with friends and people with those with us who share something in life, so it can be easy to ‘put yourself in your place’.
- But isn’t it that easy to put yourself in the place?This person we have nothing in common with.
- This is precisely the weakness of this brief definition of empathy.
Empathy is a communicative attitude that allows us to include all interpersonal interactions, regardless of who the person we have in front of us, whether we agree with it, whether we like it or not.
Therefore, we can define empathy as the ability to express RESPECT for what someone else tells us, whether they agree or not.
We sympathize with people who are different from us when we respect their positions and opinions. To this end, we express our empathy for others, showing understanding and understanding for their judgment-free posture. Here are some examples for expressing empathy:
“Do I understand that what you’re saying is important to you?” I understand you’re upset that this is unfair to you.
To show empathy it is not necessary to express our opinion, because empathy implies ECOUTE, OBSERVATION AND RESPECT in relation to the position of the other.
Surely there will be many opportunities to express your opinion, from respect and empathy, to proper and assertive communication.
Sometimes, in our day-to-day life, we think we’re empathetic when we’re actually looking to get along with each other, right?Please, the approval of the other person, and that’s not why we’re empathetic, because what we want is to show compassion. to get something in return, your appreciation. And it’s not empathy.
In other situations, we simply agree with the other person and are kind to her.
Respect implies knowledge and empathy, because we need to know and observe the other person, to show him respect.
To respect is to assume that we all have the right to decide how we want to live, think, act, feel and not judge anyone for it, on the contrary, we respect everyone’s life choices.
When we respect, we understand where the other person speaks to us on their own scale of values. We show empathy without having to “put ourselves in place” because our scale of values can be very different.
We may not share your value scale, but we identify ourselves when we respect your position without intending to change it.
Is it sympathizing to share values, likes? Empathy is expressing respect for differences, without judging.
In the coexistence of two or more people, respect means letting everyone do what they want, and empathy is showing respect, without implying change in others, without changing their scale of values.
Therefore, EMPATHY is a wonderful tool for interpersonal relationships.