There are all kinds of people: some, with your help, lighten our walk, and others are like rocks along the way that only hinder our trajectory, but what about excessive kindness?
Each one chooses who is by their side and when to set limits to avoid setbacks. Now, have you ever wondered why there are people who are always willing to help? What motivates them, even when they do not receive requests for assistance? These are the people who carry the banner of goodness and are always ready to reach out.
- You might think that kindness is always good because it helps maintain our well-being.
- But that’s not true when you cross boundaries and someone acts amicable at all times.
- It’s about toxic kindness.
- A way we forget about ourselves because they’re available to others.
“Sometimes we are so kind that we forget about ourselves and let others ignore us. Do we think we should always be good and start becoming invisible?
Sometimes we give so much to others that we stop thinking about ourselves. Think about the typical situation where a mother does everything for the well-being of her children and cares for them so much that she forgets her own needs.
This is not to say that it is wrong to do something for each other, but to focus only on each other, so we have situations in which we want to please others, either because they ask us for help or because, without asking for it, we believe they need us. and we offer them to make them feel good in every way.
Even if you don’t think this excess of kindness can come to you, sometimes we don’t let the other one do what he wants, because we anticipate it, so we focus so much on what we think the other person needs us to forget what we need.
In this way we become confused, we begin to become invisible through our own actions, always aware of others, we place ourselves in the last place, it is a way of overcoming ourselves, of detracting from importance.
We can also value kindness a lot, so as we think we should be kind, we set no limits and we always say yes to everything, we are willing to do what we are asked to do to be good people.
What’s wrong with that? If these are things that don’t bother you, of course, there’s nothing wrong with that, but imagine that, being nice, you must be in an awkward situation. Would you be willing to feel uncomfortable just for being nice?
Many times we fall into this trap, we believe that, to be good people, we must accept what they ask, because in this way we will please others and listen to them. But what about us? No end is adequate; you can be kind even if you set limits so as not to exceed or allow others to do so.
Toxic goodness poses a number of obstacles for us and our environment. Notice the following drawbacks so you don’t forget to be too kind:
These are just some of the drawbacks of toxic goodness, it’s like a vicious circle in which we forget, diminish our value and create relationships that can make us suffer, because we always expect what the other needs.
So when the other one’s not here, we don’t know what to do because we always act for him. Since we are not used to thinking about ourselves when the other is unavailable, it becomes difficult to be with us.
“I walk further away from me when I put you first at all times. “
Now, while excessive kindness can become part of us, there are ways to start being kinder and healthier, this way we will give ourselves the value we deserve and have more authentic and fluid relationships.
As you can see, it’s about worrying about you, it won’t be that complicated, because if you already know very well how to treat others, surely you can do it with yourself, so don’t forget that kindness is important, but to the right extent.
The price of being too kind to others is letting us go. Now, to give the right part of kindness, you must trust and value yourself. Only if you appreciate and know how important you are, will you understand that no one is above you. .
Also, remember that if your intentions are the best, there are those who can take advantage of your excess of goodness because they know they are going to get what they want, because you always say yes. Focus on yourself, set priorities, and set limits.