Expectations are made up of assumptions about what we think it should be, all based on what we have learned and what we have learned, often the expectations we have are far from reality and we are filled with frustrations.
It is inevitable to have expectations about something or someone, we will form them all automatically in our minds. We, in turn, have expectations about ourselves, how we should behave, or what we should aim for.
- The beliefs we form build our world and our reality.
- Expectations are a key element that influences our relationship with others and the image we have of ourselves.
Cultural expectations are those that we share with society, about what it accepts and what it rejects, we enter, without realizing it, in that set of expectations that we form through our culture, trying to adapt to what we assume we have to do, so trying not to stay out and excluded.
The image we create of ourselves is fraught with expectations: of our parents, family, teachers, colleagues, friends, partners, etc. What is expected of us influences us in the creation of our own image.
Thus appears the famous psychological event, called the Pygmaleo effect, our beliefs and expectations of a person influence the performance and behavior of that person, which leads you to create your own beliefs about what the person can and cannot achieve.
Are we living the life we would really like?It would be nice to ask ourselves if we live according to what we want or the expectations that others place on us.
You have to be a good worker, a good student, a responsible person, take care of the family. To be a friendly and cheerful woman who never poses problems; be courteous, kind, etc. All this becomes impositions that we think we have to comply with, because we are like this and we have not been able to get out of that pattern.
What happens when we step out of what we assume people expect of us? Frustration appears from people who have always considered us satisfactory expectations. If we react as we did not intend and decide to behave differently, our relationship will change. disappointing these people.
Freeing ourselves from the expectations that others put us is already a big step, a difficult task that requires a lot of courage. If, moreover, we try to understand that we have not failed and that disappointment and frustration are of others, because they are the ones who formed a belief in what we should be, even better. We must learn that, above all, we cannot live constantly behind a mask, because then we will not be able to wake up from our dream.
Our experience, what we experience and learn in all the situations we go through, will somehow shape and shape our expectations, the ones we have for others.
Let us understand that our frustration at how we believe someone is the product of our illusion. People are not, in a way; there are many factors that influence how we behave and the decisions we make. We have to go through a process of change to experiment and decide what we want to be.
If I was disappointed to expect anything from someone, it is my responsibility to accept that it was my belief, my expectation, that I believed in my mind. The other has the right not to live up to what I expected of him.
By understanding the process and mechanism of our expectations, we make them less important, understanding, more compassionate, and flexible. We accept and love people and ourselves for who they are, for who we are, with our mistakes and our successes. to be as we should be, we allow others to be what they should be and how they want to be.