Loneliness can be destructive and cruel if we make it our enemy, but the society in which we live does not help us see things differently, since we were little they have put in our minds the conviction that being alone is a negative thing, something that differentiates failures from those who are not. However, if you’re lonely, what to do?
The solution to all this is within ourselves, but we don’t see it because we have to do something very important: to do actions that by inertia only seem to be done with other people. But above all, we must free ourselves from this belief that loneliness is negative when in fact it may be one of the most rewarding experiences one can have.
- What is loneliness? Loneliness is an encounter with oneself and should not be a cause for sadness.
- Is it a moment of reflection?.
- – The principality-.
We often do real things to avoid being alone. We jump from one relationship to another, we do things for others so we don’t lose them, even if we don’t really like them. In short, a number of attitudes that we adopt so that others do not flee from our lives, because being alone is not something that we consider acceptable.
Have you ever been alone in the movies?Have you ever been to dinner at your favorite restaurant with no one else?How many times have you given up an idea because no one wanted to move on?If you stop thinking, we often limit ourselves and don’t appreciate what we like when we feel like it because there’s no one next to us. This is one of the biggest nonsense you can do.
It’s true that there will be people around you who will look weird, what maybe your family will say you are?to go alone to a bar or disco. It will encourage you to do what they say and feed that mistaken belief that you still haven’t been able to get you out of your head completely. But if you are true to yourself, if you do not sacrifice the pleasure of having companions, you will discover a world of possibilities.
“The best way to be happy with someone is to learn to be happy alone. So is the company a matter of choice, not necessity?-Mario Benedetti-
Of course, we are afraid of rejection, of feeling inadequate, but who knows if in this place, so that you do not find anyone else, is not that you go with that goal, you have to take advantage of it. anything can happen, because believe it or not, there are people who do things on their own and enjoy this loneliness without worrying about what others think.
Our fear of loneliness is the result of intense inertia for relying on others, relying on our family, our partner, our friends not only to do things, but sometimes even to be able to live, in the face of loneliness we are free. But there is also the fear of letting go, not to tie ourselves to what has given us a sense of security.
It gives us vertigo to realize that we are on a tightrope where we are not accompanied by anyone, where we only have ourselves. Fears cannot be ignored, we will have no choice but to listen to ourselves. We had avoided that for a long time. , dive into the crowd and listen to superficial conversations.
But, in solitude, we discover the wonderful feeling that we are responsible for our own lives and that regardless of the rules that society has imposed on us and all those un written laws that tell us how to live. At this moment when we are alone where our hands are shaking because we must take the reins of our own lives. How many times do we think we were free, when we actually relied a lot on others?
“To love you have to do an inner work that only loneliness makes possible” – Alejandro Jodorowsky-
Make no mistake. Loneliness hurts because it puts us in the face of our greatest fears, yet pain is always transient and never lasts longer than necessary, loneliness impels us to be ourselves, to get rid of all those stupid beliefs and norms that we consider absolute truths when in fact they retain us.
It is not bad to be alone, let alone enjoy alone, ignore all those who mock you, because they contribute to the temptation to return to the beginning, where dependence on others has overwhelmed you, if loneliness occurs in your life, do not deny it, do not try to avoid it by accumulating empty people who bring you nothing , hold it, accept it, and, above all, enjoy it. Because thanks to her you will get rich, discover and, without a doubt, grow.
Images courtesy of Junne Leloo.