Forgiveness means more than just saying “I forgive you”, much more than recovering a lost relationship, and even more than forgetting the gesture that made us suffer at a specific moment in our lives. When we truly forgive, we make peace with our own ego and feel in a state of fullness, calm, and freedom because resentment is gone forever.
Being able to sincerely forgive those who have hurt us is one of the hardest things to do, it requires great emotional strength and courage that many lack.
- When we are hurt.
- Either physically or emotionally.
- We enter a state of anger.
- Anger.
- While it is a useful emotion to defend us from present danger.
- Makes no sense when that danger no longer exists.
Prolonged anger gradually poisons us, filling us with resentment, hatred, thirst for revenge, negative emotions that are useless, do not erase the past and will not work in the present or in the future.
To free ourselves from emotions as negative as anger, we can use the power of our ideas and thoughts, so that we have control over our own minds and capture emotions. Rational thinking means not letting ourselves be carried away by impulses, imagination, not exaggerating or dramatizing. facts and, above all, abandoning the so-called ‘should’.
When our own anger drives us, we assume that others should have behaved in a certain way, so we cannot forgive them in a real way.
The fact is that everyone is free to act according to their own criteria and not guided by our own, whether we like it or not, accepting this reality and being able to endure it without too much negativity will eventually allow us to forgive. The ones that have hurt us.
Therefore, in order to free ourselves from this heavy feeling of resentment, vengeance or sadness, we must think that others are not perfect as we are not, it is normal for human beings to make mistakes, to be confused, to act viscerally. For some reason, our emotional part is part of our most primitive brain.
Even if the damage affects our own person, anger will change nothing and we will have two problems: the damage suffered by the other person’s actions, in addition to the anger we carry ourselves, which generates even more pain.
Another rational thought that can help us is the one that says that no one can cause us suffering without our own consent, it may sound strange, but it is the truth. If we know who we are, that we have a balanced self-esteem and a well-groomed head, it is impossible for us to be hurt; at least in words or deeds that do not involve physical harm.
An insult can only hurt me if I tell myself that this person should never insult me, or if I come from?Buying that person’s insult, I end up believing it and making it mine. That’s when I open the door to hurt me.
You may think that it is extremely difficult to achieve and you are right to think about it, no one teaches us to think like this, but to defend our dignity with courage and courage, to expose our own ego as if each of us were the most important on the planet.
This, in the end, hurts us because we are the ones who suffer emotionally and if we stop to think we will see that it is not worth it because we will never achieve it, anger against another person is never practical.
Although forgiveness is a difficult and courageous act, we can all do so, the rational thoughts described above are the beginning, but they do not stop there, in order to forgive we have to believe and connect with what we are talking about.
You could have forgiven if you feel inside each other, or at least one of these aspects:
You know that the human being is good by nature, he wants to collaborate and not compete, but this artificial society often teaches us other things and we get confused. Anyone can fail at some point in their life because it’s normal. You will have forgiven the other once and for all when you are able to recognize this and that thought is over with negative emotion.
You tolerate, accept and you are aware that life is not perfect and people much less, that is why you accept that there are situations, attitudes, facts that will not please you, and will even be against you, it is part of life and if we see and feel that way, it will not hurt us much. It’s disgusting that it’s not all the way we’d like it to be, but it’s not the end of the world.
If your feelings are more compassion than anger, then you could forgive forever. He has the best wishes for that person; I sincerely hope that everything will work out for you and correct your behavior, which is nothing more than a sign of the misfortune that already leads to it.
Forgiveness is not an easy mental gesture, as it is often born of your triumph in a difficult battle in the face of negative emotions, however, when you forgive the first beneficiary, you are yourself, because you can stop suffering mentally for what you have. Doing this is alleviating the unnecessary weight of this backpack we all carry.