We call the parents of the helicopters and the mothers of the parents for hours who intend to fully control and organize the lives of their children, act with the best intentions in the world, but they certainly undermine the freedom of children.
A helicopter parent or daily mother constantly reviews children’s tasks, homework, exams, and activities, without forgetting or not scheduling every minute of the child’s life.
- They are the guardians of all the information and all the academic (and extra-academic) obligations of the child.
- Generating in them a dynamic of authentic dependence.
- Making it more difficult for children to learn to take responsibility for their activities.
- Obligations and interests.
With this attitude of overprotection and the desire to create a bubble with the characteristics described, “growth” is affected. Children who don’t know each other are unable to manage their emotions and ignore their needs and ambitions.
This relationship between parents and children becomes toxic because it puts children in an overprotective bubble that tries to be the most resilient of armor, when in fact it is the best seed of insecurity that we can plant in them. In addition, these children are very licked, do not tolerate frustration and boredom, and only know how to play the passive role to which they were accustomed.
The origin of the term dates back to 1969, when Haim Ginnott wrote in his book “Between Parent
Parent hours by helicopter
This obsessive need to control everything ends up being devastating for parents, who end up exhausted, who try to offer their children a life of perfection, love and care, giving them all the resources and preventing children from making the mistakes they should be making of that age.
What happens is that reality finally prevails and the castles in the air collapse. This kind of relationship finally suffocates. Both sides end up frustrated and exhausted, causing large complexes and emotional problems.
According to several studies, the implementation of this overprotective parental style has disastrous consequences in the short, medium and long term: depression, stress and anxiety, a price that will be paid not only by children, but also by parents.
This deterioration stems from the neglect of three basic emotional needs: the feeling or perception of autonomy, the feeling or perception of competition, and the feeling or perception of feeling connected with someone, especially in adolescence and with their peers. limits development and emotional growth has devastating personal and relational consequences.
Children should be educated with care and attention, based on the amounts of all in common sense, we cannot meddle in the different areas that make up their lives or take responsibility for their obligations, because they will grow up feeling useless, incompetent and dependent, and this is precisely the opposite of what we want.
Illustration by Karin Taloyr and Claudia Tremblay