Many of us assume that we have a ‘sixth sense’, which makes it easier to know if we can trust a person, however sometimes this internal sensor fails terribly. Lies arise, unexpected disappointments and even betrayals, leaving a wound hard to forget.
Friedrich Nietzsche said that sometimes what hurts more than lying is knowing that from this experience it will be very difficult to believe in someone again, just let us down once and we are always cautious, not only does this sudden violation of our trust hurt, because, in a way, it is also common to feel bad about ourselves.
- The mind is full of questions like.
- “How could I be so naive?”.
- “How come I haven’t seen this?”Before we torture ourselves with these questions.
- We must be clear about one aspect.
- People are made to trust each other; it’s a biological feature and that’s how the brain works.
Trust is the social glue of human beings, if it did not exist, we would go around the world on alert, imagining that everyone wants to hurt us, we must have confidence to live in balance and that is not a mistake. the cheater’s fault.
The only way to know if I can trust someone is to trust them, this advice may seem surprising, but in the end we are almost forced to give up some of this personal sphere to see how the other party manages it. pro quo, a game in which everyone must take risks at some point to build strong friendships and even happy emotional relationships.
Now it is important to be careful and careful. The ideal is to visualize trust as a chest full of precious treasures, when we meet someone it is not appropriate to give him this precious gift immediately, what we are going to do is entrust him with some small objects so that he can go ahead and evaluate how he reacts, how he acts and how you react to certain experiences.
We will see below what are the most appropriate keys to know if I can trust a person.
According to a study by New York University and Dartmouth, the area of the brain responsible for assessing whether someone is reliable or not is the amygdala, after a facial analysis it is decided whether this person may be a danger or if, on the contrary, it is someone with whom it is worth initiating a certain type of bond.
Obviously, the brain cannot make a 100% reliable assessment thanks to this mechanism, our faces are not like QR codes, able to provide us with a reliable reading of what is behind us, therefore, if we have to listen to instinct and sixth sense. , let’s focus on the objective facts, which we will now look at.
If you want to know what someone is like, listen to how they talk about someone who is not present, there are people who, when they are with us, do not hesitate to criticize the people around them (friends, family, couples?) .
Those who do not hesitate to criticize and discredit those who are not present will surely do the same to us when they are with others. Also make sure you notice how you treat others. It’s an obvious indication of his character.
There is a type of profile that generates trust, we are talking about these people who are consistent with what they say and do, with what they think and defend, are personalities that in all circumstances, in any scenario or time, are the same and generally do not change.
They have clear values, which makes it easier because you know what to expect from them. There are no hidden or double-sided interests; are authentic in each of their behaviors and attitudes.
To find out if you can trust someone, evaluate something essential: if they consider you, if they care about you, remember everything you say, whether it’s important or not.
When someone cares about us, they pay attention to the small and great details that make up our lives, if they understand these details and show it to us sincerely, that person is a person of trust.
This fact is interesting and deserves to be taken into account. Research shows that people who tend to blame have a strong sense of responsibility and are therefore very trustworthy. Let’s look at this problem in detail to understand it.
Let’s keep that in mind. As we pay attention to these factors, we will always find valuable people worthy of depositing our most precious treasure: our trust.