These days couples are more fluid than ever, the divorce rate has gone up and this has happened all over the world, this fact added to the new family realities makes us face situations for which we are not fully prepared, such as the announcement. of a new boyfriend for our children.
What should be a source of joy for all family members can become a difficult time, not knowing how children will react can lead to lengthy delays and can also cause some discomfort, so here are some keys to telling you children that you have a new boyfriend or girlfriend.
- In general.
- A situation as delicate as announcing a new boyfriend to your children should be handled with caution and with a fixed plan.
- In this way.
- The incorporation of the new person into the life of his children must be gradual.
- Especially if the separation is still very recent.
In the early stages of a relationship it is very easy to lose your mind for the other person and believe that this will be the best, or that you are a perfect boyfriend without failures. However, this distorted perception of the first few months tends to disappear after a while.
So, if you know a new boyfriend better, the best thing you can do is wait a reasonable time before introducing him to your kids, for example, you can wait six to nine months.
Once you’ve decided that your relationship with this person is serious, it’s time for your children to know. It may be a little early for presentations, but you can always talk to them in advance to explain what’s going on in your life.
Children, who have never had a relationship, may not understand at first why you would want to date someone other than your ex, so it is normal that at first they feel some rejection because of the idea that you have a new relationship.
However, with a little patience and respect for their time, your children will eventually agree to see someone else. When they do, it’s the perfect time to introduce your new boyfriend to your kids, but not without talking to them first.
If your children have struggled to accept that you are dating someone else, the best thing you can do before they meet is to alert your new partner that there might be some resistance on your part.
It is important to understand that the rejection of your children is not specifically about the person, but about their past and the situation that is happening. To help you understand the state of things, your boyfriend may try to empathize with them.
The most critical point when announcing a new boyfriend to your children is when they will meet for the first time, if you have spoken to both sides beforehand, this first meeting should be quiet, but some difficulties may still arise.
Your mission in this first meeting is to act as an intermediary between the two parties, so that you are able to resolve possible conflicts that may arise. Assertiveness can become one of your most useful tools.
Once your new boyfriend and children have met, the last step is to gradually plan more meetings and shared moments, so that a cordial relationship with each other also develops, this last point is especially important in case your new partner lives with you or is considering taking a more serious step in their relationship.
As you can see, when a new boyfriend comes into your life and you want to introduce them to your kids, the important thing is to create a solid foundation to build healthy relationships and avoid as many conflicts as possible.