I’m sure that throughout your life you’ve met people with this type of profile, probably more than once, they’re people that it’s hard to live with, work and even strike up a healthy friendship, how do I get it?Sometimes they are accessible and permissive, and soon after they erect impassable walls, making it impossible to speak or do anything.
What’s behind this kind of personality?Or the simple desire to complicate the lives of those around you?We know what’s going on. It is not easy to live with people like this, sometimes they can even get the worst out of us, however we have to accept them and treat them as they are: insecure people.
What can we do? What strategies can we adopt in these cases?
See?
? Yes, but I don??, “Today I agree with everything you say or do, but tomorrow I won’t find the same thing because I’d make up my mind and I’m not prepared for it. We all live in these kinds of situations at a time in our lives, when suddenly our confidence and hope are swept away like a paper boat flowing downstream.
Personal insecurity appears in any area of our personal circle, however, let’s analyze the most common cases:
? Insecurity in the education of children: parents who base their education on unstable norms, constant changes in orientation, who end up projecting the same insecurity in children An example?Parents who promise to do certain things to their children, who say they will let them go on a certain date, an excursion, a party . . . However, later, they change their minds and do not allow it.
? Insecurity about a romantic relationship: in this case, we can illustrate many situations that can be very familiar. People who are once fully accessible, open to commitment and plans for the future, in a short time, radically change their minds and offer only vague excuses. In addition, it is also very common to meet those couples who have ended the relationship but never leave it. Do they never end, the bond, which creates even more suffering.
? Our friendships: who doesn’t have the classic friend who always needs our advice or advice to do something?He is usually close and worries, however, when things don’t happen while he waits, we’re responsible. They show both dependence and detachment, a mixture that sometimes seems camouflaged with affection and envy.
How do you treat people who capture us with your personal insecurity?We can’t break our ties with them if they’re part of our lives, that’s clear, so it’s best and right for us to learn how to treat them.
? First, we must learn that we cannot change anyone overnight. Far from solving the “problem”, start by protecting yourself, avoiding being manipulated. Keep your values and limits very clear, as well as everything you are willing to allow or not.
? Be clear about how you feel every time the person changes their mind or is unclear about their feelings. Let him know that his actions and words have consequences.
? Be clear that unsafe people often generate “negative emotions. “The last thing to do in these cases is to take responsibility for the person’s actions. If you have a romantic relationship with someone of this profile, don’t take credit for the ups and downs you’ve experienced, don’t get carried away by these emotional roller coasters that say, “Today I love you, but not tomorrow. “The problem is with the other person, not you; so objectively think about how far you’re willing to go and what you’ll allow.
? A person in safety has no doubts, let alone drags others into their insecurity falls and personal dilemmas. If you think you’re wasting your time, stay away. However, if you like the person very much, let them see what generates their behavior, but always constructively, openly and firmly.