Do you find it too difficult to express your opinions or feelings, do you think you could have said anything?long after the conversation ended, did you know it’s very hard to tell anyone?
So, dear reader, what you’re missing is a little more ‘assertiveness’. You may never have heard of this word, but there’s always a first time for everything!
“Happiness is achieved when what someone thinks, says and does is in harmony?
? Mahatma Gandhi?
Assertiveness is the way you need to communicate in order to express how you feel and believe, make honest suggestions, and, most importantly, defend your rights.
For example, if a friend asks you for help painting your home one weekend, but you have to study for an exam and say yes, he still doesn’t use self-affirmation. In this case, it is worth explaining the situation and perhaps offering help, but defining a strategy that does not take long: go on Saturday afternoon or Sunday morning.
Another case: you argue with your partner for money (most commonly) and, instead of giving your point of view, you keep quiet When?Was it really a monologue? At that moment, your brain reacts and what do you realize?You could have said a lot of things!
Well, it’s also a lack of confidence. Ideally, instead of being silent, I would have the opportunity to say that the economic problem lies in spending, rather than the few entries, right? that both should make a “war economy,” etc.
However, how can we develop our insurance without falling into big fights, problems with friends or people close to us?Perhaps what represses you the most is the fear of confrontations that may occur.
If your friend doesn’t understand that you have other things to do, instead of spending the whole weekend with him painting the house, it’s not like you’re a bad person, but you can’t take advantage of the limited free time you have to study like that either. So you, to avoid trouble with your friend, do you think so?”I’m not doing well in the test, but at least I didn’t have an argument. “
Assertiveness also means communicating feelings, but without letting yourself be carried away by emotions, in the case of the couple struggling for money, for example, avoid crying when they try to say what they think, or not scream and stress when expressing their point of view. .
Nor should we expect that, because it is more affirmative, all the problems will be over, because others will probably appear?However, you will be calm and aware that you have at least said what you thought or felt.
Better yet, you can practice self-assertion in any field, and it can be a great help to communicate and express yourself, defend your rights, say how you feel or what you think about an issue. Definitely being insured gives you freedom and calm. And isn’t that what we’re all looking for?
It’s time to get to work (or words in our mouths) and develop the self-affirmation we talk about so much. Although theory is easier than practice, it’s worth focusing on the following tips:
? Eliminate guilt: Negative thoughts or lack of communication may be based on feelings of guilt. “What a bad friend am I, how can I not help Joo paint his apartment?Keep a more positive vision: “I deserve the weekend to study and rest. “
? Remember that no one can read the mind: well, maybe some people can, but in general they can’t; others don’t have a crystal ball to know what’s happening to you, the only way to know is to tell it !
? Defend your truth: not everything you express will be absolute truth (which for many does not exist), but will you protect what happens to you?
? Be concrete: do not speak more than necessary, give the right words at the right time.
Remember that self-affirmation affects your self-esteem, because you will respect yourself.