There are many emotions that we can feel intensely, guilt, anger and sadness are part of it, however, there is one that we have not mentioned and that has such an impact that it can destroy us: humiliation.
Humiliation is a negative emotional state that leaves a deep and negative feeling in all of us, to feel useless, that we are mediocre, that whatever we do, we will be ridiculed, it is a cross that we can drag for a long time. .
- The University of Amsterdam conducted a study involving 46 volunteers to compare their reactions to different emotional states.
- Researchers analyzed participants’ brain waves by listening to insults and praise on a screen.
Participants also told different stories in which they had to put themselves in the place of the protagonists, in this way they were able to connect their emotions by putting themselves in place, for example, in one of the situations, they arranged an appointment with someone and, as soon as that other person arrived, they turned around and left.
Researchers found that feeling of humiliation causes much faster and more intense brain activity than joy, more negative than anger, and that pain-related areas are also activated.
Although praise generates joy, the feeling of humiliation was much more intense than those pleasurable emotions, but the most incredible thing was that he could not compete with anger, the insults angered or annoyed many participants, but the humiliation had a much more negative effect. Load.
Humiliation is an emotion present in everyday life, in fact many people cannot communicate without humiliating others, believing that they are doing really well, what is happening is that they do not have the empathy to convey what they mean in a more pleasant and subtle way.
An example would be the mother who praises her child’s colleague and shows him as a reference in various tasks and behaviors; you may not know it may be neglecting your child’s effort; If this comparison is made with the two children present, your child’s discomfort may be even greater because of the humiliation created.
Such situations are common today, especially in work environments, even in relationships, this emotion can also be present, it appears when one member mocks the other and makes him feel inferior.
Humiliation is an unpleasant and intense emotion that often endures over time because of the depth of your wound, affects our self-esteem, and is somehow very difficult to strengthen it again.
How can we prevent humiliation from affecting us and leaving a deep mark on us?
The key is to know and appreciate ourselves, this does not give more power to the opinion of others than our own, it is to know who we are and avoid being defined by others, in short, it is to take care of our self-esteem so that, in moments of doubt, we recover confidence in ourselves.
To do this it is very important to take care of our inner language, the way we speak to each other, do we say nice things to each other or do we repeat ourselves again and again?It’s all wrong with me, okay?Am I a mess?
We must treat each other well, appreciate each other and love each other. If we are permissive to others, why not be ourselves?There will always be mistakes, we don’t want to be perfect.
We must value ourselves to the point that any attempt at humiliation by another person is indifferent to us, because we cannot prevent others from humiliating us, but we can change the way it affects us.
Now that we understand that this is an attack on our identity whose purpose is to make us suffer, let us act, we will begin to appreciate ourselves, not so much to depend on external approval and to believe that we are good and capable.