Hyper-children are the product of hyperpaternity, a new and increasingly common dynamic that neglects important aspects of childhood, such as play, relationship with nature, boredom and problem management. A style of education based on overprotection and excessive attention and praise.
A hyper-child meets the needs of others before his own, it is a generation that has little time for self-decipherment, intrapersonal development and many personality traits that develop in childhood.
- The terms “hyperniño”.
- “hyperniño” or “hyperpaternity” refer to family dynamics that focus their efforts on controlling their children.
- So they are separated from activities adapted to their respective ages.
- The perfection of which is expected.
The term appeared in the United States and is related to the traditional concept of ‘pampered child’, however, as journalist Eva Millet, author of Hyperpaternity and Hyper-children: Perfect Children or Hypofon?(No translation in Brazil), hyper-children are under stress from their parents, which has not happened to licked children.
Hyper-children have their lives occupied by extracurricular activities that do not arouse passion, are well aware of their flaws and are treated by parents as an investment: after investing a lot of money and effort in their children’s education, they think (often unconsciously) that this value should become their success.
However, children are more aware of what we think and this pressure affects all levels. This is how their lives become a constant stress to meet the expectations of others.
However, there is another aspect of the coin: hyper-children are increasingly the center of attention in all families. As Millet points out, in the houses the photographs on display are no longer those of grandparents, but of children, who are more than ever the kings of the house, this is because today we have an average of 1. 3 children per couple, before that figure was much higher, we did not pay so much attention to the children, before they were furniture , now they’re altars ?.
This excessive stimulation generates in the child a sense of authority that is not anything positive for his personal development, so he is not able to handle his emotions well, is easily frustrated, does he feel the anxiety of the parents?become what Millet calls “hippos children,” dependent children, who can’t do anything without the help of their parents.
It is difficult to determine what the needs of all children are because, as individuals, they have their own aspirations, desires and expectations, yet one thing is clear: they are still in formation to face the real world and we cannot demand them. as much as adults.
Therefore, parents’ aspirations should never be child-oriented: thinking about the higher education their children will follow when they are not even 10 years old is especially useless, children should be allowed to develop their personality, their tastes. time, we have to let them fail, learn where the limits are and what they can learn from their mistakes if they want to push those limits.
As the author points out, the offer of activities and experiences has increased exponentially in recent years, so there are real competitions between families, parents or caregivers wonder which camp is the best, which musical instrument is the most prestigious?
All these experiences, courses and camps are big expenses, but despite this, we can’t want children to value money they still don’t understand, so instead of worrying about which English teacher has the best references to teach a 10-year-old, it’s better for that child to have a much more natural relationship.
After all, children need to grow up playing with other children, putting their skills into practice independently. Parents should not be placed as the main pillar of this relationship, but should be next door, be present when the child needs help.
It is important that the little ones learn to deal with situations that do not happen as expected. The role of the father or mother is to advise, support and, above all, to love.