I don’t have time to hate those who hate me, I prefer to love those who love me

Anyone who spends much of their time cultivating negative feelings against those who hate him forgets something much more important: loving those who truly love him. Hate and spite are two powerful and persistent enemies that tend to take root deeply in many minds. Reality are traps in which we ourselves find ourselves trapped by these negative and self-destructive emotions.

They often say that “hate is the opposite of love” when, in fact, it is not entirely true. Hate is a private but open exercise in which different emotions are intertwined: from anger, to humiliation, to aversion. a very primitive instinct that, because of its strength and its impact on our brain, can make us stop prioritizing what is really important, such as our own balance or the people we love.

  • Aristotle and Sigmund Freud have defined hatred as a state in which the feeling of violence and annihilation is often present.
  • Martin Luther King.
  • In turn.
  • Spoke of this emotion as a night without stars.
  • Something so dark in which the human being probably loses everything.
  • Their raison d’eer.
  • Their essence.
  • It is clear that we are faced with the most dangerous part of the human being and.
  • Therefore.
  • We invite you to reflect on it.

Hate is not blind, it always has a very specific goal, a victim, a collective or even values that are not shared and to which someone reacts. Carl Gustav Jung, for example, spoke in his theories of an always interesting concept: he called it the shadow of hatred or the hidden side of hate.

According to this theory, many people even denigrate others because they see these people with certain virtues that, in themselves, are missing, an example would be a man who cannot bear that his wife triumphs in the workplace or the co-worker who has feelings of hatred and contempt for others when in fact what exists deep in his being is envy.

With this, we can clearly see that hate is never blind, but responds to reasons that are valid to us. Another example of this can be seen in the interesting study “Anatomy of Daily Hate”, published in 2014 in the American journal “Association”. for Psychological Science. ” The study attempted to reveal what were the most common hatreds of humans and at what age we experienced this feeling for the first time.

The first relevant fact is that the most intense hatred is almost always generated by people very close to us, most of the interviewees said that throughout their life they had deeply hated something or someone 4 or 5 times.

Once I said Buddha, what angers you dominates you, what you hate or resent in fact makes us hostages to an emotion that, believe it or not, develops with the same intensity and negativity that we feel. One thinks of a family man who comes home with a grudge against his bosses and who, day and night, tells his wife and children about all his contempt and disgust. All of these words and driving patterns are absorbed directly by others.

In a world full of hate, we must dare to forgive and hope; in a world populated by hatred and despair, we must dare to dream.

We also know that it is not so easy to put out the fire of anger in our brains, it seems that giving forgiveness to someone who has hurt or humiliated us is a sign of weakness, but no one deserves an existence dominated by anger. Especially if we neglect the most essentials: to allow ourselves to be happy and to live in freedom.

It’s worth thinking about the next dimensions

Hate has a very concrete brain circuit that enters the areas responsible for decision-making and accountability, staying in the prefrontal cortex. As we said at the beginning, hate is not blind, so we can rationalize and control these thoughts.

It is an easy exercise that we must practice every day: the absolute detachment of hatreds and grudges.

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