They say the past always happens. This means that everything we live with us forever, one way or another, is inevitable. But between accepting this fact and being completely dominated by yesterday, there is a great distance: to immerse yourself in the option of not overcoming the past is actually to plunge into the abyss.
There’s a poem by Miguel Hernández that says, “Everything happens and everything stays, but nothing is part of us. “And so it is, it is impossible to escape what we were, the marks left to us by the past, that life has left us, but overcoming the past is fundamental to moving forward.
“The past is a prologue. ” -William Shakespeare-
Now the only way to overcome the past is to delve into it, identify how it has shaped us today, accept and integrate what it can teach us, on the contrary, if we do not look it in the eye, it may be enclosed in the confines of memory, where we cannot even access it, but it will still influence our lives.
One of the factors that prevents us from overcoming the past is the difficulty of accepting what has happened and that is already beyond the scope of our actions, it sounds quite obvious, but there are many irrational things in the human being, so even if it is useless, sometimes we regret what happened or did not happen.
This occurs when there are feelings that have not developed and integrated in relation to the facts of the past; there may be a strong sense of guilt imprisoned in us; In some cases, we are not able to forgive an offense, often harm We cannot even forgive ourselves. Consciously or unconsciously, we punish ourselves for doing something or not doing something.
Thinking about the past should always take into account an important question: is it possible to repair what has happened ? if there is still something to be done it is better to act quickly, rather than regret it or regret it, we must do what we must do. It must be done to guarantee another resolution to what happened, different from the resolution that is currently causing us anxiety. But if nothing is possible, we can only cry. It’s normal to be sad, but we can’t forget to learn from what happened.
The impossibility of overcoming the past leads us to imaginary scenarios and the “But what if I had” field. This may lead to long and eternal cavilations. We fantasize about other possible outcomes. We imagine a life in which this did not happen and at the end of the day we are in the same place, with the grievance of facing a stronger and more renewed frustration.
Accepting the past means admitting that things will never be the same again. No matter what we do, time passes and many times we have no control over what happens there. Even if we achieve it and we manage to reverse the damage or the consequences of something, none. of our actions he will be able to make us yesterday that he is no longer with us.
You have to value yourself to accept, let go and overcome the past, it is not enough to want to do that. Transcending what happened is not an act of strength, but of perseverance and conviction. There’s a good time to analyze and review yesterday, but there comes another time when the only reasonable thing to do is to leave it behind.
There are many cases in which we intend to live in the present, but even with all this will, we are unable to fulfill our promise, in those cases we must do more than keep the objective in mind. create circumstances that bring us back to the present, that allow us to stay here and now, because this moment and place require our attention. Sometimes it is necessary to build a new present to overcome the past.
To stay in the present we must cut off the bonds that can unite us with the past, at least those bonds that we can eliminate now, they say that the best way to do it is not to look back, and that is why it is important to end everything that insists on making us reconsider what has already happened, this gives us more freedom and allows us to think without the anguish of something that endures forever in our lives or continues to cause consequences.
In addition, it is important to start filling our new lives: new friends, new interests, new hobbies It’s time to renew!A moment to change our lives and build new parts of ourselves, it is likely that all this enthusiasm does not appear at first, something in us always takes us away for more of the same thing, we fight against this inertia and let life surprise us with the unexpected Now, even with many attempts and a lot of effort to move on, seems impossible , we can still use professional help.