Sometimes I’d like to run like wolves and face the highest mountain to vent and tell the Moon everything I’ve been silent, everything I’ve hidden and never said out loud. Perhaps one day she can do it, when indecision, appearances and fear, what will others say, are nothing more than an uncomfortable fog.
We live in a culture that hides your emotions. So much so that when a child reaches the age of five, he begins to develop repressive mechanisms such as containing tears, not saying certain words, lowering his face, thus fulfilling these common orders in the adult world: do not cry, do not cry. talk, not prove.
- “Half the world has something to say.
- But it stays silent.
- The other half has nothing to say.
- But won’t they shut up?Robert Lee Frost?.
Suppressing emotions from an early age has many consequences: maturity can be reached by being a slave to silences and swallowed truths, often the child does not learn to deal with this repressed emotion and ends up expressing himself in other ways, such as aggression, anger or a constant challenge.
Sigmund Freud said that the mind is like an iceberg, only the seventh part emerges from the water, the rest is buried, submerged in an icy universe where everything that is silenced and repressed is kept for fear of the consequences of the environment in which we live. Live.
Can we think about that?
Certainly this happened to you several times, when an acquaintance asked you, “Are you okay?Is something wrong? And you quickly said everything was fine. With this prayer, we use a strategy that everyone uses: that of false appearances. “We believe that our problems are of no interest to anyone and that our emotional pain must be kept in a private and hidden environment even from ourselves.
In fact, the real problem is our inability to vent and say what’s really important to us. We do not because we believe that showing pain, discomfort or concern causes us to lose our personal power.
In one way or another, when we tell our partner or family that we are not satisfied with a particular circumstance or concrete facts, we create a certain dependency; in other words, we are more concerned with how others respond to this particular event than with our own reaction.
When we value the possible reaction of others, we choose to leave things as they are. We are silent so long that we can take a little longer; In our opinion, ventilation is not important. We see suffering as normal, as someone who takes a simple painkiller to treat a traumatic injury or who offers water to a drowning man.
It’s not practical to do that. No one is an eternal balancer, because sooner or later this rope will break and eventually we will fall. Logically, the higher you are, the worse the fall and its consequences.
This fact is curious and deserves to be remembered: when something hates, hurts or annoys us, as a word of contempt, it takes only 100 milliseconds for the brain to react emotionally; later, in just 600 milliseconds, you’ll record this emotion in our cerebral cortex.
“Sometimes it is not enough to tell the truth: it is worth showing the reason for the lie. “Aristotle?
When do we say that to each other? What I’ve heard doesn’t affect me, am I going to act like I don’t care?It’s too late, because our brain mechanisms have already encoded this emotional impact. Trying to register it differently is like equivocarse. es waste of energy and resources that we should invest in other strategies.
We have been taught that showing our true emotions is a bad thing, that everyone who tells the truth attacks and that it is always better to use a subtle lie rather than tell a bitter truth aloud. This is not correct: we can affirm ourselves, without being aggressive Besides, it would be good if we started to change this classic idea that emotion is the opposite of reason, because it is not true.
When we allow ourselves to fully experience our feelings, we help ourselves to understand our needs, illuminating many blanks of thought that we often fill with misconceptions:?If I take a little more time, can things get better ?,?You certainly don’t feel what you said, is it better to pretend nothing happened?Understanding, listening and fully feeling our emotions are vital needs that we must practice every day.
We need to learn the art of assertiveness through a healthy exercise of “I feel like I deserve it. “We have to howl at the moon day and night and vent with all that we are, what we need and how much we are worth. prioritize other people’s emotions at all times. Prioritize your own emotions, the time has come to live without fear.