Before you blow out the candles, make a wish. This is a paradoxical example where one wonders about making an order. In this case, the flame that burns at the top of the fuse is like a symbol of magic fulfilling desires. The most common are our daily orders, ranging from?Give me the bread, you’re taking the kids today because I can’t.
One of the most popular scenes of childhood is one in which parents teach the child to say?And respond with a thank you when the request is answered, but we do so at a much younger age than the one that marks this scene, when we point the finger at the water bottle or toy out of reach of our crawl.
- That is why this article is dedicated to an activity that is part of our day-to-day life.
- Which is present in all areas.
- Which is explicitly taught to us when we are young?But it usually hurts.
- Thus.
- The most immediate consequence of a bad request is usually not getting what we wanted.
- And if only for that reason.
- It is worth learning to ask.
What we want in response to a request is a promise. A promise that keeps a commitment that someone will do something we want. In fact, most requests stop being made the moment we get a response, not what we wanted.
On the other hand, a query expresses a need and therefore indicates a vulnerability, so many people abstain when placing orders, they do not want to know where they need help, however, they prefer to try to get out of the situation. on their own before asking someone for help.
In addition, there are some very curious phenomena that can facilitate the acceptance of an order. One of them is known as “standing at the door. “Do people use this strategy to try to get the other person to respond?Yes, a request that, if made directly, would be rejected. To do this, they first place a small order, then a larger one, and thus gradually go up to the order that basically interests them.
Today we go out, can you come in at noon and see if everything is in order?
-Of course!
– As long as you go, would you mind spending time with the dog?
Uffff? . Okay
Another way we are more receptive to accepting an order is based on a reverse procedure: this time, the skilled beggar begins by ordering something that he knows the other will not award, and then makes a much less demanding order, which is essentially of interest to him.
– Scrub the kitchen and remove dust from your room before leaving
-I can’t, I don’t have time.
-Well, at least walk your dog before you go.
Uffff? . Okay, okay
Finally, before defining the four elements that frame an order, it must be differentiated from the claim, many people try to place an order through a complaint, for example, instead of asking their boss to get a chair to improve, he openly complains about not having it.
One of the most common reasons to use the complaint instead of the request is that the first does not make us vulnerable (it is possible that the recipient of the request/complaint will call us weak). Another circumstance in which we use the complaint instead of the application is when we believe that the request will not be met and that the complaint is then the final expression of the feeling of unrest.
Let’s go with them! First of all, it’s about putting a topic in order. The most powerful and effective is “I”, far from the impersonal (“Would you use to improve the office chairs?). In this way, the person who commits knows with whom he does not keep the promise, and the person himself acts as an evocative of his memory. On the other hand, it is easier to say no to an indefinite person than to a particular person.
Secondly, the order must have a receiver, away from . . . Could someone pass me that chair, could someone move me for tomorrow’s shift?Better yet, Pedro, can you give me that chair? In this way we will talk directly to a specific person who will no longer be able to circumvent our request because it has not been mentioned, which is also important in the requirements at work: it is better to know who will make a decision about our order and direct the order specifically to that person rather than to the company.
Thirdly, the order must have a satisfaction time, this usually happens when we send emails with a request, it will be more effective if we specify when we need the task, in addition, particularly for this medium, it should be noted that they are waiting for a response.
Fourthly, demand grows when it materials, it’s very different to say: do I want you to behave?, I want you to be quiet during the ceremony and when you’re done, you can go say hello to your cousins. , the child may have the intuition that he should behave well, but he may not know exactly how to do it, because the context is new to him. With the second type of request, what we want you to do is very clear. not only to education, but also to adults and in all areas.
As we said at the beginning, we ask every day, but we are not good at it, in fact many of the demands we make are diffuse and unclear, partly because different fears hide behind them (fear of rejection, fear of asking too much , fear of inconvenience, fear of favoring?) And partly because more and more? please? and thank you “nobody taught us to do this well. I hope this article can help you on this topic!