After a night of sex with a person you don’t know much about you wake up with a strange feeling, you liked it very much, but something is missing, you don’t feel completely well in your skin, you feel empty In fact, few gaps are as special as this, you rarely lack as much privacy as you do now.
This feeling occurs because, most of the time, you seek affection, you need to feel loved, and you do it through sex, thinking that the intimacy of two naked bodies is the only possible intimacy, and this is not the case. You’ve probably even given up hope of other intimacy, because of the effort and time it takes to build it, or the price you can afford if you’re betrayed.
“I don’t know the recipe to fight heartbreak, but I don’t think it’s to stop loving. -Enrique Hernandez Reina-
We talk a lot about sex and love and we confuse and mix them continuously, we can have a very pleasant sexual experience with someone without the need for a romantic relationship, the psychologist Silvia Olmedo said that sexual desire can occur without love and without any affection. or emotion.
However, frequent sexual encounters, with everything they do in terms of desires, emotions, intimacy, sex, can be the basis of a sentimental relationship, it is not uncommon that by the repetition of these encounters, the connection and complicity between the couple develop gradually.
“Intimus”, a Latin word meaning something like “The Innerest”, “The Deepest”. In other words, it refers to our inner world, a world we do not show to others. It fills us with hope and what shames us. We keep all this because we can suffer deep wounds if we entrust them to the wrong person.
Intimacy with another person involves making one’s own inner world known and making known the world itself, complicity, knowledge of time, curiosity about who that person is, seduction, intimacy occurs when walking, chatting in a café, preparing dinner together, traveling, sending a message to find out how the other person is doing.
Sex is also a manifestation of intimacy, but it is not the only one, intimacy, in general, both inside and outside sex, implies a situation in which we feel comfortable and safe, a space created where we can be ourselves and not be. Fearful.
If you think about it in detail, when you meet a person you know nothing about them, and over time you realize that many things are not as you thought, but they are different and sometimes even better. You also feel different because you have opened your heart to that person.
Intimacy is achieved when words are not necessary, a look is enough to understand what the other thinks, when one forgets the clock and lets the minutes and hours pass, when time seems to pass slower with every gesture of affection and affection.
In today’s society everything happens very quickly, and whenever you meet a person the possibility of a sexual encounter can arise without the social condemnation of past times, you can fear that the other person will discover your secrets, be afraid that they will reject you again, and when a little emotional intimacy occurs, you escape.
Intimacy arises when you lose the fear of showing yourself, that the other person sees your faults and shows them theirs, and it takes time and patience, it is not enough to undress your body if you do not undress your skin: you are talking about a process of mutual knowledge that takes months or even years.
When there is intimacy between two people, sex improves as it becomes a manifestation of desire, affection, affection and love. Intimacy invades not only the bed, but everything around the couple, their daily lives, their looks, their caresses.
The same goes for friends. When you meet someone with similar interests, you feel a certain connection and start sharing, talking, discovering that person, and over time a deep and sincere friendship develops.
Overcoming the fear of intimacy with another person involves dealing with that fear and knowing that every time we show our soul, our hearts will take a risk, however, this risk is necessary to live, know us and make the most of our existence. .