If you are not in love, perhaps one of your dreams is to enter this state and enjoy all that a relationship can bring you, this is a very common desire. In fact, romantic love is said to be the only great utopia of postmodernity. It is also said to have become a kind of collective anesthesia that, in many cases, ends up being disappointing. Looking for love or anesthesia?
There are those who go further. They point out that this desire to find love is not really born of an intrinsic need, but is the result of a skillful manipulation of an “industry of affections”. Would it then be some kind of “domestication”? It seeks to reduce its emotional world to a single plane: romantic love.
- That’s why there are hundreds of messages that subtly announce an idea: falling in love is finding the cure for all evils.
- And they also convey to us the idea that our life project will only be complete when we find “the love of our lives.
- “Besides.
- This love is supposed to make us much stronger emotionally.
At this point, we can ask ourselves a question: do we seek true love or do we want to fill our existential void with a romantic ideal?
“Often sensuality accelerates the growth of love, so the root is fragile and easy to start. “Friedrich Nietzsche.
Many people have developed a strong appetite for intense emotions, so they assume that feeling too much is also “feeling alive. “This need for intense emotions is more present in those who feel that their current life is boring and meaningless.
The complicated thing about all this is that all these intense experiences are, by their very nature, temporary, could not have been otherwise. If they were repeated too often or lasted longer than necessary, they would gradually lose their exciting and intense character.
Therefore, all these experiments pretend to be volatile, they make you live a moment with a lot of intensity, but at the same time they are ephemeral, many people want that love: blind and brutal, they think it will last a while. long time.
Due to their expectations, they are easily and intensely disappointed. In these cases, one might wonder: are you looking for love or anesthesia?
The origin of these frustrating misunderstandings lies precisely in the strong distortion suffered by the concept of romantic love in our time, many people do not know how to solve the problems they encounter in their life and seek a veil of hope in romantic love.
Almost everyone has great plans for themselves, usually associated with success in the eyes of others, in this logic, the couple becomes someone who facilitates or fulfills these goals, that is, a piece that corresponds to this narcissistic conundrum, reducing life to this. The idea tends to create a sense of existential emptiness: an icy cold that intensifies when reality does not correspond to its pattern.
Those who think so avoid two ideas. The first is to understand that there are ideals and values that go far beyond social success. The second is that a healthy and normal life includes boredom, monotony, frustration and sadness at different times and under different circumstances.
When we romantically say that love is everything and that it is the essence of life, no one lies, what is sometimes forgotten is that this affirmation refers not only to love as a couple, but to the multiple dimensions of love: self-love, love of work, humanity or its ideals.
Falling in love is not an experience that can only be lived as a couple, romantic relationships as a couple are only a small part of this immense constellation of love and, we can say, not necessarily the most complete expression of this love in capital letters than so idealized.
In any case, the most important thing is to understand that love does not nullifies or eliminates other aspects of life, contradiction, emptiness and boredom are not automatically eliminated by the work and grace of love, in fact it is in these difficult realities that true affection can take root and take root.
Love for yourself and others does not lead you to paradise, but to a deeper and more transcendental human reality.