There was a stir following the publication of a US study on sex among friends, indicating that 20% of respondents had sex with friends, most surprisingly, these same people ensured that sex strengthened friendship and that much of the business became formal appointments.
The research was conducted at Boise State University and was led by Heidi Reeder, 300 people, including men and women, were consulted. And, as already said, 20% reported having sex with friends at least once in a lifetime.
“Love is the answer, but while you wait, sex asks you several questions. -Woody Allen-
Those who participated in the survey stated that these relationships were based on an agreement in which it was explicitly agreed not to involve love and also that the relationship would not imply any commitment. This is called “friends with benefits. “
76% of people who had sex with friends reported that after this moment of intimacy, friendship had also improved 50% started formal meetings, in which they became involved until participating in the survey.
As for the topic between friends, opinions are divided, there is no applicable conclusion in all cases because the outcome of this type of relationship is closely related to the characteristics of the people involved, in some cases everything is going well. In others, this only causes great confusion.
The truth is that there are currently many couples of ‘friends with benefits’. These are spontaneous links in which explicit agreements are sometimes made and sometimes not. The basic agreement is to maintain a friendship without sex being a reason to interfere with nature. , commitment or link label.
In general, it works well when you consciously accept the rules of the game and respect them, the difficulties arise if the agreement is not very clear to one of the two, or when sex between friends is a strategy, conscious or unconscious, to address a person with who wants to establish a formal relationship.
At first, sex between friends occurs because two people know each other and there is attraction, but there is no love, it is also motivated by the fact that the people involved do not want compromises, this is a type of relationship more common in adolescents than in adults.
Even if there is sexual relations between friends, this relationship does not presuppose the existence of a couple, this means that there are feelings of friendship, but not feelings of love, in this type of friendship people spend time together, talk a lot, do we do common projects, but we have no obligation?
Therefore, there are all the conditions for giving one but one relationship: the willingness to commit to the other. One way or another, anything except making requests or complaints about the type of relationship is allowed.
Sexual intercourse between friends usually works when the rules of the game are respected and both enter into this type of relationship with total honesty. The basic rules of this relationship can be summarized as follows:
It is very important that the agreement that gives rise to this type of link is as explicit as possible, what is not discussed or is not established can lead to errors on the part of one or both parties involved, everything becomes better if those who decide to start a sexual relationship already know each other well. Think that if you don’t know how the other person behaves under certain circumstances, you may have unpleasant (but also pleasant, of course!) surprises.
It should be noted that there are circumstances in which this type of bond is not practical, when one of them has a sentimental commitment, for example, this type of love triangle is almost never a good idea, nor is it a good sexual relationship. between friends when the people involved are ex-boyfriends, which can certainly lead to many misunderstandings. Finally, if one of them starts to get passionate, the right thing to do is to tell the other and reformulate or end the pact if the other does. don’t feel the same way.