“Is there no one less fortunate than the man who has forgotten adversity, for he has not had the opportunity to be tested?(Seneca).
In the context of both science and popular belief, the “midlife crisis” is often evoked. Various hypotheses are formulated around this concept, which often correspond to reality, but in some cases feed a contemporary myth.
- First.
- Let’s define what “middle age” is.
- A few centuries ago.
- The average age could be between 20 and 30 years ago.
- Today life expectancy has increased considerably and the average age may be between 35 and 45 years old.
- Under normal conditions.
In specific times and contexts, such as an epidemic or a war, life expectancy decreases considerably; in different social classes, life expectancy also changes; a Third World miner is more exposed to illness and death than someone who works in an office in Canada.
The second point is to clearly define what the word “crisis” means. Etymologically, it is a term derived from a Greek word, which means “to decide”. Popular use has given it a very pejorative meaning. When it comes to crisis, many I understand that this is a “difficult period. “
Throughout our lives we go through many moments of crisis or choice, which usually occur in situations of change or transition, occur in adolescence, when humans leave the world of children and become adults, and also when we get married and the phase of passion. Romantic ends and fantasies confront everyday reality.
They can also occur when we have a child, when we suffer a significant loss, when we give up an ideal or re-evaluate a political or religious belief.
The common ground between all these crises or options is the reassessment of our entire lives: a reorganization of beliefs, feelings, values and ideas.
A crisis always means growth: we acquire new emotional and intellectual tools to take on the new, integrating past experiences with new skills and new subjective resources.
In the case of the midlife crisis, the tension is caused by the transformation of a young adult into an older adult, which brings many losses and some gains. Physically, there is a significant change: the skin loses its shine and dries easily. You can’t eat pizza at two in the morning, like when you were young. If he falls, he stands up and asks God not to break. Bones.
We realize that youth has passed and we have entered middle age, the changes are not always pleasant: aging in general, menopause, the death of parents and children who leave home to take care of their lives.
Socially and emotionally, there is a great transformation. At that moment, you realize that you did not fulfill all your childhood dreams; he admits that you are not an astronaut, a famous sportsman or the youngest scientist who has made a great invention; at this point, you’re more aware of death. .
For the mature adult, that is, married, with independent children and already graduated from the university, who enjoys a retirement that allows him to live without worries, this stage takes place normally and accepts with some serenity the last years of his life. .
If, on the other hand, the person ages without a good financial situation, with precarious family ties or with a sequence of losses in his history, he may not have a quiet old age.
However, the midlife crisis, with all the choices and decisions we make, is a phase of new opportunities. As an old saying goes, give up the impossible, do your best and learn to recognize the difference between one and the other.