Lack of love is a fall in which the greatest fear is to feel the deepest loneliness, which is no longer full of illusion, is a feeling of painful emptiness when we end an intimacy that connects us to the world.
Falling in love is the terrible vertigo of watching the other person’s ideal crumble, as Alfred Hitchcock’s film “A Falling Body” explains.
- Heartbreak is the fear that the loved one will fall from a great height.
- When we are witnessing it.
- Without being able to do anything.
- This is the process in which there are no drugs.
- Or scaffolding.
- To last beyond.
Faced with this situation, we have chosen to flee or continue to maintain a structure in our head that keeps our loved one safe, a loved one who exists only as a product of our imagination. Is it the love made for our fantasy, what would you have liked to happen?
Lack of love sometimes resists facing reality, but when it does, there is no solution to the trauma of separation, we can no longer turn pain into magic. It’s really over.
Many of us would rather not repeat the love stories that uprooted our souls, we would not want to realize that there was a limit that could not be crossed, nor to know that the lack of reciprocity no longer provoked intrigue or mystery. but saturation and deep desolation.
Falling in love: this feeling that the other person was never what we thought, that what we thought was a corresponding love was just another story for the other.
The emptiness of being in a relationship where the other seems increasingly alien, to which we collapse and feel a hole in the stomach.
When that happens, it’s like we have a problem in our hearts, a blindfold that fell out of our eyes. Love is over because, ultimately, we see this person as he is, without filters as we wanted him to be.
Thus, we see the way in a monotonous, lifeless way, love produces vertigo when it no longer exists, collapses from a great imaginary height and does not find a solid soil that sustains it, perhaps that feeling never really existed, or just disappeared.
We love to build images of love in our minds. Sometimes we do this because reality is unbearable, there is a trauma that we live alone or a deep disappointment.
Before we face this vulgar, hard and monotonous vertigo of everyday life, we finally turn the page, cover reality that is not finished with colorful papers and turn it into fantasy.
With these ideas of how we would like it to be the other, not what it really is, we endure marriages and illusions of platonic love, stories that are not over and that, in our opinion, will eventually work again.
In fact, we have already created so many scenarios that sometimes we end up ignoring wonderful realities, people who loved us, pampered us and would never leave us.
It is clear that love needs mysteries, words and truths that do not always have to be obvious, only when the eyes and silences need it.
Sometimes words are the key to a feared and delayed reality, of something to be shown and which, at some point, has been preserved as an inner treasure.
There are quite different love stories, but if you think yours matches the one you imagined 90% of the time, you may have a problem, there are stories that go beyond time, go from childish state, evolve and go from the perfect image. from the imaginary to the imperfect, much more exciting and uncontrollable, of reality.
This can only be achieved if we have the courage to take the step in time before it is too late.