Each person is an island in itself, in a very real sense, and can only build bridges to other islands if he really wants to be himself and if he wants to afford it (Carl Rogers).
Living consciously can be difficult when the facts we face are related to ourselves.
- Perhaps we love one part of our bodies more than another.
- Just as we have personality traits that we may like and others that we do not.
- This situation sometimes leads us to escape.
- Reject or deny certain aspects of ourselves.
But how do we accept these traits and aspects that we do not fully and unreservedly love?
Canadian psychotherapist Nathaniel Branden suggests that we say the following:
Whatever my flaws or imperfections, I accept myself without reservation and totally.
And, moreover, let us be aware that accepting does not involve loving, or that we do not want changes or improvements. To accept is to experience the reality of oneself without any negotiation or rejection, thus handing over to reality. Over time, we’ll start to feel more comfortable with ourselves.
In general, our strength increases when we do not constantly fight reality, because our fear will not disappear with the cries let alone because we reject ourselves, but we can experience an attitude of acceptance and, subsequently, of change, because full and sincere acceptance. tends to make unpleasant negative feelings disappear over time.
You don’t have to tell the victim for fear of relaxing, because at that moment she won’t know how to turn this advice into a driving experience, but if we advise her to breathe slowly and deeply or imagine how she would feel if she wasn’t afraid, we’ll offer her something executable, through which she can begin to open up to fear and understand it , to finally face it.
Accepting ourselves does not mean that we do not want to change or evolve because we think we are already enough in different aspects of our lives, but that we will focus on what we love about ourselves. what we do not like and can begin to change In fact, self-acceptance is the precondition for change, because only when we accept who we are and what we feel, do we allow ourselves to be aware of our choices and actions. . An old proverb expresses it very well by saying: “What endures persists, persists. Only when we started accepting changes in situation. ?”
To accept ourselves as we are is to accept that what we think, feel and do are expressions of ourselves, at a time when things happen.
Remember: when we fight a blockade, it doesn’t break, but it gets stronger, but when we recognize it and accept it, it starts to disappear, we can’t overcome something we der-do.
Bibliography
Branden, Nathaniel (1988) How to Improve Your Self-Esteem. Ediciones Paidus Iberica, S. A.
Image courtesy of Andrei Balan