The poet John Ciardi said: “You must not suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone. “While it is true that a teenager may feel deeply misunderstood, this stage does not have to be so tragic. other cultures have estimated that adolescent conflict is the product of a combination of cultural factors.
Psychologist and teacher G. Stanley Hall thought that “adolescence is a new birth, because with it are born the most complete human characteristics”. It is a radical statement, because it is an unknown step that is presented to the child, where everything is new. It’s a search for oneself, like being unique and individual.
- Intellectual and popular knowledge circles understand that adolescence is a time of many changes in a short period of time and that children are under intense pressure from their peers and family members.
How can we help you right now?How can these changes be integrated without causing trauma?
Understanding a teen is not easy; it takes effort and patience for adults. Teenagers change a lot since childhood: this sweet and understanding child becomes a distant and rebellious person; and parents don’t know what to do.
However, some keys can help parents understand the teen’s real needs and the sudden changes that occur in their psyche.
Empathy is necessary in all walks of life, especially to understand adolescence. You have to put yourself in each other’s place and understand their feelings and mental processes.
We were all teenagers and went through this phase, so analyze your feelings, thoughts, desires and sadness, but be careful!The past can help us, but we need to look at the situation based on current circumstances. Time has passed and many things have changed.
For example, we can’t say that teenagers don’t need a mobile phone simply because we didn’t have it when we were teenagers, we can’t do it because our adolescence was different from today’s adolescence, if we want to understand the current teen, we need an effort. that goes beyond our memories.
The teenager begins to live a new stage in his life and needs more independence and autonomy, for him social acceptance is very important and how they are perceived by others.
Minimizing this importance is a serious mistake that the adult should not make, as the adolescent’s brain and life experience are not yet fully developed.
Understand that a problem for you is a speck of dust for them is a stone tower. Show empathy and recognize your suffering, your need for independence and problem solving according to your abilities. Support the children or they’ll stay away from you.
“At fourteen, don’t you need a disease or a death to believe in a tragedy?
-Jessamyn West-
Many people think that adolescence is synonymous with rebellion, but that is not true, it is simply a stage in which young people need independence, new horizons, a certain distance from their parents to find their way, if we reject them, they rebel.
Remember that the young person begins to think in a more rational and abstract way, his body changes, like your brain and your way of seeing the world, he needs to impose himself, leave the comfort of parental control and find his own ethical code. .
You have to understand that this is a complicated phase to try to dominate the teenager, it is normal for them to argue, to talk about their views, false or not, and to disagree, if we do not accept it as a natural and logical thing. , we will not be able to dialogue or understand children at this stage.
If you want to understand a teenager you have a difficult task ahead of you, it is advisable to talk a lot, give it space, understand that it is no longer ”your baby”, to be realistic in your goals. , to provide useful information and be aware of potential problems, such as lack of goals, drastic changes, poor academic performance and radical change of friends.
“Is adolescence a combination of childhood and adulthood?
-Louise J. Kaplan-
Understand that a teenager is only complex if we do not give him the attention he wants, with the right information, an empathetic and understanding attitude everything will go well, remember that this child was raised and educated by us, thus helping him find his place in the world is easier than he seems.