When someone tells us something, they expect us to be careful, for a while, to put aside our concerns and be prepared to face their own. In a way, what you expect from us is a conscious listening: a selfless act in which we make our cognitive resources available, so conscious listening is an act of generosity.
Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you wanted to say something important to someone and were constantly interrupted by the phrases “what’s wrong with me?”, “Should you have said or done this?”, Or “I had this experience. ” when ?? Or did they even ask a question off the topic you were talking about?
- Right now.
- You may feel bad and see that a wall is being built in front of you called frustration.
- It’s the feeling.
- So familiar especially in adolescence.
- That the world is a strange place without contours that match yours.
- The logical consequence is that you stop trying to communicate or that your efforts seem increasingly desperate.
It also often happens that you do the same with other people and it has the same unpleasant consequences. If you want to improve your relationships and communication with others, it is essential that you practice mindful listening.
Immaculate Dominguez is a psychologist who has studied the subject in depth, then we will focus on your research to try to answer that question, as the name suggests, active listening is what we practice consciously and voluntarily, includes elements such as empathy, love for the other person, respect and attention.
It’s about letting the other person talk, paying close attention to what they’re saying, not interrupting them, asking questions that show interest in the subject so that the other person feels really listened to, in fact, it represents an act of true generosity. towards each other, of genuine interest to him or her.
In this way, we give time and leave space both in our hearts and in our minds to our interlocutor, who really need, because the lack of time, the culture of immediacy and self-centeredness mean that unconsciously we do not devote time or listen to him. which seriously impairs our social relationships.
We need to be heard, a necessity that is part of our nature as social beings, if listening is not reciprocal, the other person will notice a lack of interest in your feelings and in your life, honestly no one likes to be with someone who doesn’t care.
Unfortunately, this is something that is happening to the vast majority and has increased with new technologies. Today we see groups of people who don’t talk because they’re stuck on their mobile phones. Then why are you coming together?
People focus on what happens on the Internet, what they think, what they mean, their own concerns, tasks, etc. They never stop, keep quiet and listen to what others mean, and it also creates a lot of confusion that can end in discussions.
If you want to improve your life, your relationships with others and yourself, develop this type of listening, you will notice the difference:
Practicing conscious listening is an act of generosity towards you and your interlocutor, with the other because you will receive a gift as precious as your involvement, and with yourself because this challenge always represents an opportunity to grow.