Living with border-limiting personality disorder, or TLP, is very difficult for both sufferers and the family around them.
It is a rare psychological disorder, as it is detected in approximately 2% of the population and is usually diagnosed after age 20-25; however, PLT symptoms have existed since the beginning of personality development, around age 12-13.
- Although this is a rare disorder.
- It has been extensively studied due to the everyday difficulties and problems involved in living with border-limiting personality disorder.
- Being a disorder characterized by impulsivity.
- A great fear of abandonment and a lack of emotional regulation.
- We can understand that it is a problem that causes different inconveniences when it comes to leadership.
- A normal life.
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For all this, in this article we want to illustrate what it is like to live with a border-limiting personality disorder and what can be done when you have it. The points developed in this text are based on different testimonies of people with TLP, and the advice is inspired by Dr. Marsha M. Linehan, a global expert on the subject.
First, TPL has a high level of impulsivity that varies depending on a person’s mood and situations, living with a borderline personality disorder means living with a tendency to have impulsive behaviors that lead the person to make decisions and actions that they immediately regret. the words of a person with TLP: “It’s like living with a balloon that can explode at any moment in your hands. “
Similarly, impulsivity in TLP is felt in many aspects of the patient’s life, for example, in interpersonal relationships very hasty decisions can be made depending on how you feel at that time, on the other hand, in the context of working or professional life. Living with a border-limiting personality disorder can mean a constant change of employment without knowing very well why you’re not satisfied with any work, plus all of this implies constant instability that also interferes with emotional regulation.
“Living with borderline personality disorder involves living with a tendency to engage in impulsive behaviors that lead the person to make hasty decisions and perform actions he quickly regrets.
In this sense, people with TLP need to develop cognitive and behavioral strategies and skills to manage impulsivity, and it is also essential that people with TLP are able to use positive and flexible statements when assessing everyday situations and experiences.
Living with borderline personality disorder is often the same as not being able to enjoy relationships because you are always afraid that the person you love so much will leave, so it is understandable that TPL is characterized by a significant fear of abandonment . This leads the person to focus so much on the relationship that they lose sight of the positive aspects of the relationship, due to the anticipated fear of possible abandonment.
On the other hand, the fear of abandonment does not need to be expressed verbally, that is, the person with LPD does not need to tell his partner, friend or family member: “I am afraid that you will abandon me”. What usually happens is that the fear of abandonment manifests itself above all at the level of jealousy, seeking to control the other, without wanting to carry out individual activities or be alone. TLP therapy also helps control fear of abandonment and eradicate jealous and controlling behaviors.
While it is true that people with TLP have had experiences of abandonment at the family or sentimental level, the problem is that they cannot overcome these abandonments and generalize this experience to almost every area of their personal life, so therapy for people with TLP addresses the importance of healing the wounds of the past and uses different techniques to overcome this fear.
As one of the main symptoms and one of the most characteristic, TLP has difficulty regulating one’s emotions, in this sense people with LTP face daily a number of intense emotions that are often disproportionate to the situation they are experiencing. Living with a border-limiting personality disorder is living very intensely, for better and worse.
We need to understand that emotional regulation problems come from childhood, when the child sees his feelings incapacitated and receives the message that what he feels is not important or correct does not acquire the ability to identify emotions or know how to soften them. make adult life equal to “feeling a lot of emotions that you don’t understand and all happen at the same time. “
“Living with a border-limiting personality disorder means living very intensely, for better or worse. “
People with PLT experience the best and worst in the world of emotions because they have difficulty adjusting their emotional response and have a limited repertoire of emotions, all very intense, this is one of the reasons why many TPL therapy sessions are dedicated to emotional regulation skills, for this we work the identification of emotions and techniques to soften them , such as relaxation, paradoxical intent, distraction techniques and mindfulness.
Finally, it is important to note that living with a borderline personality disorder requires a lot of patience and empathy for others, because, as with all personality disorders, those around the patient are also affected.
If you have TPL remember that people who love you the most may feel they don’t know what to do or how to help you in many cases, it’s a good idea to see a specialist professional to guide you.