In some cases the family is a source of stress, there are times when the roots of the family tree hold us from the feet without letting us out, asphyxiating us by their toxic behaviors, their demands, their phobias and their emotional bonds governed by a clear narcissism. Managing this type of dynamic and family stress is essential to protect our dignity.
Some say that being born is almost like falling out of a chimney, you never know what home you’re going to find, you don’t know what this first socio-emotional scenario will look like that will determine much of our psychic structure. , or what kind of attachment we’re going to develop with our parents and guardians. Nor do we know if this family will bring us happiness, whether we will be raised with negligence, or whether we will witness an environment where reproach, attack and contempt. will prevail among its members.
- “We come from ourselves.
- We go to ourselves.
- Even if family and society try to avoid this.
- Let’s be ourselves!?? Alexander Jodorowsky?.
If having a good family is almost winning the lottery, surviving leaving some frustrations intact is also intact. It is common for certain needs to persist, that even after we have matured, we continue to clash with the values of our parents, even the rubbing with our uncles and even to compete with our brothers for this or that.
Cohabitation is not always easy. However, when there is respect, these seemingly antagonistic processes can flow with some naturalness, allowing us to count on them, with this family that, as the popular saying goes, must be in the good and the bad. What should we do when there is no respect and our mood is continually weakened and vulnerable?How do we act when we feel the family is stressing and suffocating us?
Sometimes we tell ourselves that we will never fall back into the same mistakes. We have convinced ourselves that we do not go to meetings and celebrations that always end badly. We try to make a pact with ourselves: we will stand firm and we will not. we give in to certain blackmails and demands that often leave indicators of our self-esteem below the minimum, however, we fall into the same traps several times.
How do we avoid this? They are members of our family, we try to honor this and respect it day by day, although the price of our stoic devotion is increasing, we face situations that we do not know how to handle very well, we let blackmail, lower our Heads to contain our emotions and bite our tongues so as not to lose relationships for life.
When the family stresses and suffocates us, we think of many things. Perhaps the time has come to formalize a final launch?Or do we continue to assert ourselves in this lifelong blood bond?It is not necessary to fall at these extremes, it is not healthy or allowed. Let’s see below what guidelines can be applied to resolve this situation.
It is recommended not to make extreme decisions and observe everything with great peace of mind when managing the stress that the family generates.
Wear and tear in situations of family conflict can be very important, because of the number of feelings and postures you encounter. This emotional erosion can be so profound that any word or gesture in this suffocating family context is intense and even exaggerated.
Thus, a first step on which we must work is inner calm, when someone has endured so much in life accumulates immense frustration, a rage that is embedded and takes root, we must channel and calm all this. Once we’ve analyzed these emotionally charged pieces, it’s time to work on the next look.
When people do not develop a strong sense of identity, defined and separated from their family context, their emotional well-being is in constant danger, it is necessary to cut this umbilical cord and treat us as independent entities according to their own values and needs. .
When identity and self-concept are firm, we know what is right, what is permissible, and what is not; In addition, not only do we see more clearly toxic behaviors or narcissistic acts, but we also have fewer reservations to impose limits: we know that they are necessary to improve coexistence.
Family stress is rooted in lack of harmony, it occurs because there is a force field where both act as opponents and not as facilitators, a very common fact in these scenarios is the need to always receive the approval of others, not to leave. those lines that some draw and in which others must register almost by force so as not to disappoint.
This last point is not being a family. The royal family is a unique microcosm where the most diverse elements coexist in perfect harmony, it is a precious stone where the most varied minerals are embedded, with their own colors, their fabulous properties and their uniqueness, it is this diversity that traces the beauty of being all different, but at the same time exceptional, we understand that a family, a good family , respects and approaches, does not drown or assume an obstacle to our growth.