In the spectrum of emotions, anger is the most explosive of emotions, compared to fire, and can cause similar effects of damage and destruction if its flames are not controlled over time. Fortunately, you can do a lot to put out this fire before it goes out. Too late.
Like any other emotion, anger plays a survival role and is therefore neither bad nor good; The key is how we carry it out, in this case anger arises in the face of a situation that we perceive as threatening, as a driver who passes recklessly in front of us causing an accident, this event that jeopardizes our integrity instinctively prepares our bodies. for two possible scenarios: combat or flight, depending on the magnitude of the threat. So far, we’re talking about automatic reactions.
- According to the analogy of fire.
- It would be like the initial spark that can generate fire.
- Depending on the existence of combustible substances that feed it.
- In our case.
- Fuel is thought.
- And it is at this critical moment that we have the power to light or put out the fire.
Considering that instincts play a leading role in the preservation of the species, what distinguishes us as human beings comes into play: our thoughts and values, let us take the example of the traffic accident to illustrate the process and see what we can do:
? Recognize signs: The first step is to learn how to detect the physical changes that accompany anger, as well as events that tend to irritate us so that we can stop them in time, so the driver of the example can experience an acceleration of pulse and breathing, muscle tension, hardening of the face and a feeling of warmth. Once you have identified these changes, the irritated driver may begin to breathe deeply to calm down, because breathing is the only physiological function we can control. at will and, by regulating breathing, a bio-feedback is generated that has a calming effect on our emotions.
? Mindfulness to thoughts: this is crucial, because if our driver directed pejorative thoughts against the other driver like?What animal?Is it an idiot?Would you pay me ?, etc. , simply put more firewood and cause a bigger problem, on the other hand, if our friend decides, once past the initial scare, to try to understand that the other driver could be distracted because he has personal problems and that he was simply a momentary oversight, judiciously choosing positive thoughts and values like compassion , the intensity of the fire would be extinguished and the event would not take on any greater proportions.
? The result: Depending on how our driver decides to use his free will, the results would be opposite, if you follow the incendiary route, you could get into a fight with the other driver, in addition to suffering the devastating effects of anger. in our cardiovascular system, and you could even have a heart attack, on the other hand, if you wear firefighter clothes, you could win a new friend who can help you in the future but the most important thing is this feeling of having overcome your own destructive tendency and bet on peace? . Priceless!
Image courtesy of Ben Raynal