Currently, there is a lot of information that brings us closer to the reality of being a mother. However, few speak of a realistic approach to the crisis in which a woman can immerse hem with motherhood.
Laura Gutman addresses this theme in her book “Motherhood and encountering one’s shadow”. This psychotherapist explains how women come into contact with their shadows as soon as the children arrive.
- “A woman may feel that her internal structure.
- Balance and emotional stability are completely altered when faced with motherhood.
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The term
Does the whole universe have its opposite pair: day and night, man and woman, positive and negative, shadow and light?Our psychic world is also formed by its luminous and dark part. We don’t see what’s in the dark, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.
Shadows have developed since childhood. From a young age we build our personality and ego structure, sometimes there are painful feelings and events that we cannot digest emotionally and that we decide to forget, we turn our backs on them to continue on the path of life, these unresolved and sometimes the unconscious aspects are our ‘shadows’.
“If we do not exercise the exercise of sincerity to question our most hidden, suffering or painful aspects, they will try to sneak into the less opportune moments of our existence. ” – Robert Bly-
Regardless of our age, the child we went to continues to live in us, sometimes to help us enjoy and have fun, and others to connect with the most vulnerable part of ourselves, with our most primary fears, with our memories and perhaps with what we have. we were missing.
Motherhood shakes us in such a way that it discovers all our disabilities or emotional wounds Does motherhood give us back our experiences with the mother, with the father, with the people who raised us and emotionally fed us?The most moving memories of our childhood. These memories, perhaps painful, that had been buried until now.
During pregnancy, this childhood memory wakes up. At this point old conflicts begin to appear, wounds that have reopened and all this emotional explosion coexists with the physiological, hormonal and energetic changes characteristic of this period.
In these cases, is it normal for women to experience confusion, sadness, anxiety?And many times they decide to go to the doctor. It often happens that a sometimes incorrect diagnosis of “depression” or “postpartum depression”. This usually involves automatic prescribing of medications that block thinking and emotions, in this sense it should be noted that medications can provide temporary relief, but if there is no psychotherapeutic work, the wounds will be reburied without being healed.
It should be noted that many hidden aspects of the female psyche are revealed and activated with motherhood. Is it usually a moment of revelation, of crisis? It should be noted that this can become a process for which psychotherapeutic assistance and support is recommended.
In this sense, we believe that making the unconscious conscious makes us grow and mature, make pain conscious, move it and highlight it is the right way to heal it, so that it does not turn against us at times when we are most fragile.
“Moving and overcoming pain makes you develop aspects of your being that used to sleep, gives you the vision and safety of those who have learned to navigate strong waves. “
On the other hand, to regain and strengthen self-esteem, it is necessary to heal the emotional wounds accumulated since childhood, that is, to find and heal our inner child, thus dissolve the patterns created to compensate and manage pain. , achieving a process of personality reintegration. In this way, healing is possible, promoting motherhood and a healthier, balanced and happier life.
“It is the task of every human being: to walk the earthly life in search of one’s own shadow, to highlight it and to follow its own path of healing. “- Laura Gutman-