“The secret to a pleasurable old age is just the signing of an honor pact with loneliness. -Gabriel García Márquez in One Hundred Years of Solitude-
If you don’t plan to spend, continue, or end your life on your own,
- This will be the result of your investment in relationships How much do you invest in yourself to cultivate the presence of people by your side?.
There are species that live well alone in nature, but we are certainly not one of them. Loneliness “devours (?) And it causes discord in our hearts. “
It’s feared and may become inevitable. Being alone, or rather feeling alone, is not something you want or want, loneliness bothers you. We are beings with a physical and emotional need to speak, listen, live together, our identity depends on the other, it is not enough to exist if it is not visible in the field of view of another individual.
It is from the closeness of other people of our species that we acquire basic skills such as acting, we imitate, learn and for that we must be in a group, we are, on some level, dependent on the reality that comes from the confirmation that the other gives us. You just get sick, you lose simple, immense pleasures like talking.
Today’s world has faced too much individualism. Do we see small portions of eggs, bread and yogurt for sale in the markets?everything so that it doesn’t spoil before consumption in a secluded house. In real estate promotions, small spaces where a maximum of one or two people live. A crowd of solitaires walk the streets with this device called Smartphone. As another columnist said, “Are we bored? We’re alone. Losing the ability to relate every day. We’re bigoted. We prefer loneliness!
Loneliness is like walking on a treadmill in an empty, quiet room. The seconds pass slowly, we only hear our footsteps, as if life only worked to survive, because if we stop, we will fall. Overwhelmed, no pleasure. Walking nowhere, without moving.
No one projects loneliness. Only those who learn to live with it. Before you start throwing stones, okay? Being alone is good, it’s good when you want to read a book, listen to a song. Many want to be alone, but never alone. We want to be alone for a while, but not forever, no one wants to spend their lives alone.
Perhaps, as Gabo quoted in what is his masterpiece to me, loneliness is a contract that we will have to sign in old age, but it is necessary to have lived and kept memories to endure such an end.
I see individualism and the choice of loneliness as a type of social disease that affects our typical way of behaving, this is not natural for our species, however, unknowingly, we are the protagonists of distance. Do we distance ourselves from each other all the time, not just because of the convenience of idealized relationships in the virtual world, we walk away because we are intolerant. We disagree all the time and, at the same time, we just want those who always agree with us. We are not absolutely willing to live with differences and believe that loneliness is a better option. I’m sorry, but I’m not.
The exercise of living with the other of our species that, although similar, thinks and acts differently, is a basic precept, we lose the ability to change, to give even a minimum in the name of a relationship, and this will lead us to the inevitable loneliness, a loneliness that no one foresees and that no one wants.
No one does a project of loneliness, but it is the inevitable consequence of those who abandon the habit of coexistence, those who think that being right is more important than being happy, those who have stones to throw away all the time, those who build walls around them and give up one of our greatest pleasures as a person, that of not being alone.